lalala-garance-dore

10 months ago by

La la la laaaaaah!!!

My first few days in LA, I was so stressed out, I couldn’t stop saying to Chris :

“I can’t believe it, I can’t believe this, seriously I can’t believe it!!!!” – I don’t think he’d ever seen me like that, so shocked and moved.

I mentioned it in my New Years post, but now it’s official: Chris, Lulu and I have moved to Los Angeles.

LA. So far, so different, so weird… What’s gotten into us?

It all started when Chris and I met. When I met Chris, I was a real New Yorker. I had all my armor on: I felt strong, independent, nothing scared me, nothing could get to me.

Same for him. He had come to New York thirteen years prior to work and live on his music. He knew the city like the back of his hand. And I could feel the softness under his hard shell of independence. For a few months, we played the very New York game of “who needs the other person less.” It wasn’t easy, because we’re both pretty romantic – and we were pretending to be tough, cause here that’s what you do.

Like me, and like all New Yorkers, he loved New York. But he was always saying: “One day, I’ll leave. When I’m fifty, I’ll leave. I need to be close to the ocean, I need nature and more space.”

I never liked to hear that. Maybe because I’ve seen too many people around me wait for “one day” to finally be happy. Someone I knew was always saying to me: “I’m working like crazy right now, but when I’m 45, I’ll stop.” And what happened? At 40, he fell into a depression and never really recovered.

So when I heard that, it rang an alarm bell.

It’s also that to me, these last two years felt like life was insisting on proving to me that everything I believed in was false. And one of the things I believed in more than anything else was that I was going to spend the rest of my life in New York. Where else?

But even so, it seemed like nothing was really happening the way I wanted it to in New York.

——

First, one surprising detail. I was actively looking for an apartment to buy in New York for the past three years. I never found it. I never found the place of my dreams or a place I could project myself into the future in. As a result, I always rented. And as much as I like the places I was renting, I never truly felt at home, because I was always waiting for something else. Having a home is so important to me that it always felt like my real life had never begun.

The other thing that seemed strange is that I never managed to create the lifestyle I really wanted. At first I thought it was because I was traveling all the time, and that I was always a little bit tired. But when I decided to cut back on traveling, I realized that wasn’t actually the problem.

Even without traveling, I always felt exhausted, stressed, empty.

I had memories of my life in the South of France, where I had a patio, where I could host dinners, where my friends could stop by, and we could waste time together. There was a sort of softness to that life that I never found in New York.

In New York, everything felt overwhelming.

I saw my friends who managed to juggle an important job, an amazing apartment, a dream body, children, and host dinners, and I seriously wondered how they were doing it.

Me? I always felt like I was fighting against the current.

Whether it was the weather (long, super cold winters, suffocating summers), my schedule (the craziness of always doing more and “I’m so busy!!!”) or simply the incredible culture of success that can sometimes feel like it’s transporting you and sometimes suffocating you.

Because in New York, you’re never enough. There’s always something or someone more pretty, more successful, skinnier, younger…You can always reach higher. And even though I love that culture and the feeling that in New York, anything is possible, at one point, I needed to sit down for a minute (or rather, I needed to have a mega-breakdown and collapse on myself) to try to figure out if my ambitions and my desires were actually mine, or if they had been subtly influenced by the society I was living in.

And when I finally managed to sort through all of that, I realized I was running a marathon that wasn’t mine at all. Which is probably where that feeling of permanent exhaustion was coming from.

But I definitely tried:

The funny thing when I met Chris was that all of the sudden, we were so joyful and full of energy and a desire to be happy that we did everything we could to make our life in New York a real pleasure. We tried to make the best of the freezing cold and go snowboarding in the mountains (result: IT’S ALSO FREEZING IN THE MOUNTAINS). We tried to make the most of New York night life and found ourselves partying like we were 23 (result: WE’RE NOT 23 AND WE QUICKLY FELT EXHAUSTED/WASTED) and we tried the typical New York weekend of yoga/brunch/shopping/movie (result: I THOUGHT HE MIGHT DIE OF BOREDOM).

No matter how hard we tried, it just wasn’t working.

We felt more and more uncomfortable, more and more stressed, and more and more tired. It was even affecting our relationship.

Not to mention the quality of my work. I felt like I never had enough time. Never enough time to draw, never enough time to write, never enough time to think. Even so, as I often explained to my friends, I had plenty of free time! But that feeling of exhaustion was always holding me back, I think. On the weekends, all I wanted to do was collapse on the couch.

At one point I told myself it couldn’t go on like that, we had to find a little house upstate as soon as possible so I could return to earth, or anything to make me feel like I had a life that wasn’t a never ending race.

Otherwise, we were going to turn into the New Yorkers who never grow up.

What’s a New Yorker who never grows up?

People say it all the time: New Yorkers who never get old. Physically, they always look ten years younger than their age. And I attribute that to one thing: a life that never stops. I know plenty of people who are fifty years old, single, working like crazy, partying like crazy, spending their lives on Tinder, and who still live in the same apartment they had when they were thirty, and they love it.

[Interlude Tinder Forever : I have a friend that I love and he has four girlfriends. Since it’s casual dating, it doesn’t count as cheating, according to him, and he says he doesn’t see why he should commit to a relationship when he’s able to have this situation where he never gets bored – he’s alone when he wants to be, with someone when he wants to be, and each of his girlfriends has a specific role in his life. There’s the sex-crazy one, the intellectual one, the funny/cool one… and when one of the relationships ends, thanks to Tinder, there are never-ending options. So, yeah, he’s 45 and would like to have a family and all, but, you know… Cynical? Naaah. I love him anyway, but I’m glad I’m not on Tinder!]

And I can totally see how that might happen!!!

Time goes by faster in New York. You’re never alone. There’s always a new person to meet, a new restaurant to try out, a new job to pursue. It’s like a big ship with a constant party going on. And it’s hard to leave the party.

Especially when people think of you as a sellout when you start thinking about packing your bags. It’s as if we were all hanging on to the same rope, all trying to climb higher, and the ones who let go of the rope lose the fight.

I know this, because I’ve been on both sides.

I remember when Alex, who worked with us in the Studio, started questioning her life in New York. I looked at her like she was crazy: “What? To go where???” She was reading a book called Goodbye To All That, inspired by the famous text by Joan Didion on the subject.

It’s a collection of stories by writers who loved, then hated, then left New York.

A book of sellouts, basically ;)

Anyway, where was I…

Oh yeah, so, at one point, I said to myself: we have to have a country house. With a garden and everything. New York during the week, countryside on the weekends. Perfect balance…

… ?

But in the end, that didn’t solve the problem of the below freezing winters. The pounds of snow cold enough to rip your skin off, the sweat of our brow. The traffic jams on weekends. And I still didn’t have the apartment I really wanted in New York, so I was going to buy a house Upstate? That didn’t make sense…

And secretly, knowing us, I knew that as soon as we had a country house, we’d never want to leave. And I’ve known more than one New Yorker who turned into a hermit never wanting to leave the joy of their house and garden Upstate, distancing themselves more and more from the city.

I run into them in New York sometimes and it makes me laugh. They look a little lost and happy like the people who know that the truth lies elsewhere. And often, they’re wearing a plaid shirt ;)

So, we weren’t quite ready for that.

So what else was left for us?

Well… LA.

LA, a city we both hated as soon as we got there. The first time I went to LA, I didn’t get it at all. I was 16 and trying to find the “city center.” It took me several days to understand there was no city center. Just cars and strip malls. I came back later on and it was the same thing. What a weird city. It took me two or three visits to really understand the magic of it.

And when I finally felt the magic, it never left.

I stayed in LA for a month while I was writing my book, and I still have memories of that amazing feeling of fulfillment. Sun, calm, intense creativity, smiling well-being.

Don’t laugh, a lot of things about LA take me back to my roots…in Corsica.

The vegetation, the palm trees, the eucalyptus, the fig trees. The constant temperatures in winter and summer. The proximity to nature, available to you at any moment, whether it’s the sea or the mountains. The softness of life here.

I don’t know how I got to this point, but one day, I suggested to Chris that maybe, maybe, I know it sounds crazy, but who knows, maybe we could be happy in LA. He was hesitant, because he had bad memories of the city that, as we all know, has lots of not-so-good sides. So I proposed, without really believing it, that we spend a month there to try it out. We’d go to Venice, because Chris surfs just like he breathes, and because I like to be able to walk everywhere and Venice is the only place in LA that I know of where you can walk everywhere (even though people look at you like you’re crazy, but we’ll come back to that in another post).

So we did it, and we both adored it.

There, I was able to project my dreams.

I imagined myself happy, creative, fulfilled, deeply calm, rested. I imagined the same thing for Chris. I was also finally able to imagine that it could work out, working remotely, becoming bi-coastal, spending at least one week per month in New York working with my team. And slowly developing a studio in LA. We could even do workshops in LA – I knew they’d be delighted to come visit me in March when they were sick of the winter temperatures in New York.

We could invent a new life for ourselves. And have a little garden, and enjoy the city too, because LA is a city that happens to be exploding with creativity. It was time.

———

Even so, I didn’t quite believe it, and that’s why for the first few days, I was drunk with anxiety: “I can’t believe it, I can’t believe it, seriously I don’t believe it!!!” I couldn’t believe that for the first time in my life, I had made a decision that took into account every aspect of my life. Not just my career, but also my most authentic self.

I almost felt like I was being selfish.

Choosing happiness? Do we really have the right to do that?

———

I won’t be able to tell you for years whether LA is my city for life. I also know I still love New York and even if this life makes me happy, I know I’ll want to go back to New York often. To see my friends, rub shoulders with the craziness and the quick pace, and stay connected to the heartbeat.

But I also know it was time for me to do something. You can’t just watch your life go by, passively, exhausting yourself to find comfort in the uncomfortable.

There’s no way of knowing what’s best for you if you don’t try.

And of course there are risks. Chris is going to work on developing his career here, even though he’s such a success in New York. He’s going to have to do a lot of trips back and forth. It’s a whole new world for him, and I’m really proud of him for being so brave.

I know a lot of people leave New York only to come back a few years later and never leave. I don’t think that will be us, but the one thing I do know today is how I feel, right now in the present moment.

And right this minute, as I’m writing to you from the patio at Superba café in Venice, with my dog sleeping at my feet, I feel, selfishly, so good.

I send you big hugs and kisses with all my warm heart.

Translated by Andrea Perdue

183 comments

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  • My life is in such a state of flux due to many reasons. Reading this just now, it’s made think even more, that if less is more, then nothing is everything. Starting over, simply trying and taking steps out of the ‘norm’ is a true sign of strength and shows you have the determination to succeed. Thank you for sharing and making a lost soul who has nothing, appreciate she has everything. Bright lights, big city will always be there. Sadly, it takes us an age to realise our souls will not x

  • Profite Garance, tu le mérites! Et si c’était la maturité tout simplement….

  • Emily P. January, 17 2017, 9:44 / Reply

    Garance, Congratulations!! So happy for you and Chris for taking such a big leap. This post is so inspiring and a reminder to never stop being curious. Can’t wait for more posts about sunny LA!

  • Emily P. January, 17 2017, 9:45 / Reply

    Garance, Congratulations!! So happy for you and Chris on taking such a big leap. This post is so inspiring and a reminder to always be curious. Can’t wait for more posts from sunny LA!

  • Ces articles sont de loin mes favoris Garance. Toi et ton honnêteté, ta franchise sur ces moments délicats du quotidien. J’ai hâte que tu fasses part de tes endroits favoris à Los Angeles. Ces endroits cachés qui te feront un bien fou :) x

    Jessica — NinetyCo 

  • I’m from southern California and lived in LA for 5 years (I’m on the east coast now). Honestly, LA is wonderful and it is a city that, for many people, grows on you with time. It is massive and therefore every type of community or vibe you want exists within it. It just requires some work. But yes, the nature, the ocean, the mountains, the WEATHER. I miss it. I miss the pace of it.

    Congratulations on the move! I hope you come to love LA as much as I did. (And given that you’re from Corsica – which I have visited and love – I totally understand the need to be near the ocean and the trees. I grew up by the water myself and that need for nature never leaves me).

  • Sunny Side January, 17 2017, 10:11 / Reply

    L’essentiel est que tu aies écouté ton “gutt” ! Je ne connais pas L.A, l’hémisphère sud me tente plus comme Byron Bay. Qu’importe le lieu, chacun a le sien, mais aller là où enfin le temps devient enfin votre ami.

  • This post means a lot to me. I’m struggling deeply with demands that only seem to intensify (sickness of spouse and extended family, growing job responsibilities, chronic pain, no time for my creative parttime job I hope to turn into full time). I am 40 and don’t want to end up like your friend, in a depression I can’t recover from (I have a dual-sided mental illness). I cannot figure out how to slow down my life. Thank you for helping me feel less alienated.

  • warm hugs from Asia :)

  • ¡Se me están cayendo las lágrimas de emoción! Gracias por contarnos tu viaje vital, es emocionante siempre. Inspiradora siempre. ¡Que os vaya bonito!

  • So many things I relate to in this post, I really don’t know where to start….I’m a Greek living in Belgium, therefore totally getting the inherent need for a warm, sunny place to call home. I really admire you (both of you) for taking the decision, I’m in the “when I turn 35 I’m going back” phase, but I went through it before reaching my 30’s as well, so I don’t really know how much I can trust myself with taking the big step! I can only wish you good luck, I’m waiting for loads of sunny pictures at the beach on the blog and your Insta feed and I’m hoping your updates from LA life will give me the little push I need to look at my life and I want I really want besides a career!! Merci Garance, un grand inspiration commme toujours :)

  • Je pense qu’il n’y a rien d’égoïste à vouloir être heureux et apaisé :)
    Au contraire, on est bien avec les autres quand on l’est avec soi-même.

    Souvent, je me pose la question de partir de ma ville. Certes, j’habite Lille et ce n’est pas comparable à NYC mais j’ai rencontré quelqu’un qui habite dans le Sud de la France (le Var) et quand j’y vais, ça m’apaise. Moi qui ne jurais que par le Nord et par la ville, et qui aimais juste aller à la campagne de temps en temps pour voir les parents.
    Ça fait un moment que je me dis “dès que je veux me remettre en couple (vivre avec quelqu’un j’entends), je file vivre à la campagne !” et là, ça devient vital !
    Ce que tu dis de NY (le célibat, la fête, …), c’est ce que j’aimais avant et qui me pèse maintenant.
    En fait, j’ai envie de partir de cette ville avant de me mettre à la détester :)

    Et puis tu sais (je pense que tu le sais ^^), si vous ne vous plaisez pas à LA, vous pouvez toujours partir. Rien n’est figé dans la vie.

    Bises Garance,

    Manon

  • Thank you for sharing this! My daughter, who is in her 9th year of living in NYC, is experiencing burn-out and is ready to make a move, and is also considering L.A. I’m forwarding this post to her.

  • Garance,
    Welcome to LA and sunny So Cal! I hope you find and keep your piece of heaven here. My heart and soul are here in So Cal — born and raised. L.A. is the most amazing, creative, full-of-magic city, and I’m certain you and your love will find “home” here.
    Best to you,
    Judy

  • Welcome to LA! I am an avid follower of your site… and I’ve delve into your delightfully inspiring book. When I just read you are now here, I had the same “I can’t believe it!” reaction. I am so pleased you are taking the leap to the west side. You’ll definitely vibe with Venice and perhaps Topanga Canyon if you want to be more secluded in the mountains of Los Angeles. You are amazing, Garance! If you ever need a helping hand from a native in LA, I’d be more than honored to participate in your creative practice. Enjoy the sunshine (and be grateful for the bit of rain, we need it!)

  • Hello Garance, I moved from NYC to LA five years ago and am finally starting to feel at home. Like you, I was born and raised somewhere else (the Philippines, warm weather, aah), and came to the US well into my working life. I still miss NYC, but a few days in Manhattan on my yearly trips back leave me wonderfully wired, yet tired pretty early on. Isn’t the Westside great? (am pretty close to Venice) I wish you well and I hope to run into you in the neighborhood someday!

  • Oh! Welcome to California! I loved reading your posts from your month-long visit and that you could see what is so wonderful here. Your writing + your drawing + California . . . can’t wait to see it . . .

  • Bravo! Je le savais… Et je comprends. Ici, j’ai quitté Paris pour le Pays Basque à l’automne. De mon côté, ça a été un déclic: “je me sens si bien ici”, puis une obsession, après la prise de conscience. Je voulais aussi partir avant de détester Paris. Je travaillais dans la mode sans avoir jamais vraiment le temps de profiter de quoi que ce soit, sans avoir l’impression de créer quoi que ce soit non plus, étrangement. Ici j’apprends le basque, je prends le temps de dessiner, et je vais me former à la permaculture. Je vis à mon rythme et je suis bien, tout simplement! xxxx

  • HappyLilly January, 18 2017, 3:09

    J’ai quitté Paris pour le Pays basque en avril dernier, j’aurais pû remplacer chaque NYC par Panane et chaque L.A par Anglet.
    Aucun regret. Moi l’urbaine intoxiquée. Seul mon amoureux savait qu’on faisait le bon choix, tout le monde pensait que je n’y tiendrai pas. A chaque doute, au moment de chercher notre logement, il me prenait par la main et hop: face à l’océan! A chaque fois, face à l’océan, j’ai sû que c’était l’endroit où je devais être. Le seul qui vaille.
    A ce jour aucun regrêt.

  • Marie Duc January, 17 2017, 11:10 / Reply

    Hyper inspirant! Félicitations et longue vie à ton bonheur! ;)

  • I never write any comment, but Im a regular reader since the begining. And…Bravo! Je le savais… Et je comprends. Ici, j’ai quitté Paris pour le Pays Basque à l’automne. De mon côté, ça a été un déclic: “je me sens si bien ici”, puis une obsession, après la prise de conscience. Je voulais aussi partir avant de détester Paris. Je travaillais dans la mode sans avoir jamais vraiment le temps de profiter de quoi que ce soit, sans avoir l’impression de créer quoi que ce soit non plus, étrangement. Ici j’apprends le basque, je prends le temps de dessiner, et je vais me former à la permaculture. Je vis à mon rythme et je suis bien, tout simplement! xxxx

  • Welcome to L.A. Garance! I remember meeting you at your signing here and at the time I couldn’t believe you would leave New York. It makes a ton of sense now, plus a change of scenery is always good.

    Enjoy and congrats!

  • super nouvelles !!Je l’attendais ce post de je suis bien arrivée et j’ai pris suffisamment de recul pour pouvoir vous raconter !! Alors la vie est super, c’est génial ! Et vous avez trouvé un appart, une maison, comment ça marche ? Tu vas résister à autant de trajets avec NY et si longs ? Ca impressionne vu de loin.
    Et tu sais dans ton post 2017 tu as parlé du conte des chaussures rouges, de Femmes qui courent avec les loups. Je l’avais ce livre mais je n’avais jamais réussi à rentrer dedans, ces paraboles et symboles de vieux contes me saoulaient. Ca m’a donné envie de le reprendre, j’ai commencé par ce conte, et j’ai continué continué. Je vis aussi une perte d’énergie depuis que la vie de notre entreprise (à mon partenaire et moi) s’est multi-accélérée, avec beaucoup de violences externes contre, enfin plein de choses très stressantes et je suis encore fatiguée 1 an après. Je sais plus comment me ressourcer. Pourtant j’habite depuis 5 ans l’endroit de mes rêves :D Donc le levier n’est pas là. En tout cas je commence un nouveau job le 1er février, c’est une nouvelle étape de ma vie qui s’ouvre, j’espère que ça me fera l’effet que LA te fait !! :D
    Je suis super contente pour toi et pour vous et pour la première fois, je t’embrasse fort fort, et plein de bravos !!

  • Thank you! Thank you so much for this. I sincerely wish you and Chris wonderful life in LA. Brave and inspiring. Thank you dear Garance!

  • Oh Garance I understand completely, sometimes you just need to think about you, your balance and your mental (and physical) health! I couldn’t resist more than 3 months in NY, I felt so oppressed by everything. The architecture, the weather, the amount of people that look so driven but also so so unhappy. If you are happy, you made the right decision and if you ever change your mind, you can always go back!

  • Formidable! Ton texte est très touchant. Bonne installation à tous les 2!

  • Congratulations, Garance! Im a born and raised New Yorker who moved here about 7 years ago. After my first 4 years, I decided that as beautiful as life was in LA, I was a New Yorker at heart. I returned to NY and lasted exactly 12 months. It was hard and cold and ruthless. I had become “California Soft”. I promptly moved back to LA, and I will never, ever, look back. Every single morning I wake up, even after 7 years, and thank god for this amazing place to call home. It blows my mind every day. Enjoy. xxx

  • Welcome to LA! I moved here 25 years ago for love and work, but found I really like it. The trick is to find a neighborhood or area that feels right, I think. Glad you’re here, and I look forward to attending any workshops you decide to host.

  • Welcome to LA! I met you at your book signing, and was hoping you’d make the move. I moved here 25 years ago for love and work, but found I really like it. The trick is to find a neighborhood or area that feels right, I think. Glad you’re here, and I look forward to attending any workshops you decide to host.

  • Je suis admirative de ta capacité à garder sincérité, courage, désirs, choix personnels (sauvegarde personnel) dans un cadre de vie aussi médiatisé et successful.
    Merci pour ces moments de vérité et plein de bonheurs à venir pour cette nouvelle vie, même si c’est toujours la même, même si elle n’est pas “pour toujours”, c’est une étape prise.

  • Isn’t everyone moving to LA right now? I mean, since Hedi Slimane (running Saint Laurent from LA), it’s like so “trending” (I miss Pardon my French videos!!!). I guess NYC hype is slowly starting to decrease (may be because it is SO expensive to live there, LA looks like a more affordable homebase). It may have been another reason that made you feel more confortable there over the years. Same could be said for example for Bordeaux in France.
    Each city has its moments :)
    Congrats, and hope you’ll enjoy your new way of life !

  • Welcome to LA! I think you’ll like it here. I moved here mostly for better career opportunities, but found within a few months I really liked it. The trick, I think, is to find an area or neighborhood that feels like a good fit. Anyhow, I hope you’ll stay, and look forward to any workshops you decide to host.

  • I super enjoyed reading this ??
    I’m planning to live in LA, and can’t wait to savor the next stories!!!
    It’s never easy following one’s intuition!! So, Bravo Garancé!
    Wishing you the best ?.

  • I super enjoyed reading this ??
    I’m planning to live in LA, and can’t wait to savor the next stories!!!
    It’s never easy following one’s intuition!! So, Bravo Garancé!
    Wishing you the best ?.

  • I know the feeling!
    I left Paris 12 years ago to live in Lisbon, Portugal because I understood that life was slow and cool there. With a lot less expenses, I bought the apartment of my dreams with a terrace and each day I feel so lucky!!
    Good for you Garance !

  • Paula, i’d love to know more about your life in Portugal. my husband and I live in Noho and are thinking about packing up and heading there.

  • Hi Lauren,
    Of course I can tell you more about Lisbon, send me an email it will be easier than talking here at lisbonbylight@gmail.com

  • Ah the ever comparing east vs west coast dilemma. Both have their advantages and disadvantages so depending on what moves or interests you most, you’ll find answers. I’m originally from NYC and moved to LA 32 years ago. I learned to live there and find my way but it was like trying to put a square peg into a square hole. I never fit. Oddly enough I found peace and love (with my husband) outside of LA in Ventura County where it has all the beauty of the land and none of the traffic, congestion and smog of LA. I try to keep my reasons to visit LA to a minimum and visit NY often and that’s how I finally found my fit.

  • Because in New York, you’re never enough. There’s always something or someone more pretty, more successful, skinnier, younger…You can always reach higher.

    This sentiment won’t change once you’re in LA. Everyone is so fake here. Pinterest and Instagram does wonders for making LA look amazing.

  • Nathalie January, 17 2017, 4:38

    Un grand bravo!
    Ce sont parfois certains signes auquels on accorde trop peu d’importance mais qui sont le plus révelateurs comme le fait de ne jamais trouver l’appartement rêvé à acheter malgré l’offre (NY quand même!)
    Le vrai courage ce n’est pas de s’accrocher de toutes ses forces à une situation insatisfaisante mais de faire face à ses propres peurs et préjugés afin de les dépasser.
    Je te/vous souhaite beaucoup de bonheur à LA.

  • Funnily enough, that is exactly what I thought! I’ve never been to LA, but my impression of it is that it is full of cosmetically enhanced people, obsessed with looks (that all-american tanned, blond California thing) and an obsession with healthy eating fads. Couple that with awful gang crime, mall after mall of dull architecture and reality TV shows (and everyone seemingly wanting to be a TV / movie star), its just never appealed to me. (sunshine yes, but a lot of places have that). However, I am hoping to be proved wrong and look forward to Garance’s LA stories and wish her and Chris all the best.

  • Félicitations!!

    Je ne sais pas si c’est les bienfaits de l’air marin, mais j’aime beaucoup ton illustration, elle respire le calme et la liberté.

    Merci d’avoir partagé avec nous tes questionnements sur NY/LA, choisir sa ville, choisir sa vie… on est nombreux à se poser les mêmes questions et je trouve tes réflexions très justes et bien dites.

    Une de mes proches, anciennement authentique parisienne (le genre à ne pas posséder de chaussures plates), est partie à la poursuite de ses rêves de chanteuse, d’abord à Mexico, puis dans une petite ville balnéaire mexicaine toute calme. On s’est tous dit d’abord qu’elle était tombée sur la tête, qu’elle allait revenir illico. Cela fait maintenant des années, je ne l’ai jamais vue aussi épanouie, et à l’avoir vue dans son habitat naturel qui est de passer sa vie à chanter puis lézarder à la plage avec des amis, je me dis que finalement, elle a été la plus maligne ;)

  • Congrats, Garance! Such an inspiring post and I loooooove the Superba cafe-great spot!

  • Mariateresa January, 17 2017, 12:21 / Reply

    What a notice Garance! You’ll be the queen of LA, you’re are déjà la Reine of the world!

  • Bienvenue à LA Garance, Chris et Lulu!
    J’ai parfois l’impression d’avoir eu la même expérience que toi, mais en avance rapide. J’ai quitté la Californie du sud depuis presque deux ans pour l’Oregon.
    Je sais que je suis faite pour l’Oregon, la nature, la montagne et l’océan pas loin, un quartier où me promener à pied mais j’ai parfois la nostalgie du soleil californien (non pas la chaleur, mais cette lumière si particulière). Mais, comme toi, je sais que je peux y retourner quand bon me semble, que la Californie ne sera jamais très loin, qu’elle aura toujours cette place spéciale dans mon coeur.
    Je sais combien elle m’a rendue malheureuse par moments, et me rassure en me disant que je suis mieux comme ça, près de la nature au quotidien (sous la neige depuis une semaine à Portland).
    Et comme tu le dis dans ton article, qui sait, peut-être que j’y retournerai vivre un jour (très peu probable).
    Profite de ta nouvelle vie californienne,

    – Chloe
    http://consciousbychloe.com

  • Welcome to the neighborhood! It really is that good… ;-)
    (Let me know if you need any local Venice tips!)

  • I lived in LA in the 90s, as a teenager. It wasn’t a cool city back then and it was such a cultural shock coming from Europe!
    I love what you say about NYC, very insightful… I’m feeling slightly unhappy in Paris and keep on looking for womfort in an uncomfortable situation, not feeling courageous enough to move out from the city. So thanks for giving us ideas.

  • Quel chemin parcouru ! C’est chouette ! Toutes mes meilleures pensées positives pour la suite !

  • Je trouve tout a fait normal ce besoin de changement radical apres un “trop plein” newyorkais. Quel luxe de se reveiller au soleil (presque) tous les jours, prendre son café a l’exterieur, profiter de l’ocean, de la montagne a proximite. Serait-ce le reve ? Du moins pour l’instant ! Bon emmenagement !

  • This post made me so happy for you! You will LOVE sunny So Cal — come visit Orange County, as well, we have the most beautiful beaches IMHO ;) xox

  • Agnès Mallet January, 17 2017, 1:20 / Reply

    What a lovely post, Garance, full of life, and smiles and warmth, you exude well being and it’s contagious; i can almost feel the California sun kissing my cheek and the pace slowing me down into the ‘here & now.’ I love how you speak from the heart, always, so genuine and real, and that’s why we all love you, watch out LA! Warm wishes for you, Chris & Lulu. Sois heureuse!

  • Welcome home!!!! Six years ago I made the same move from NY to LA for similar feelings and reasons :)) Like everything there are pros and lesser pros but in all of that there is so much beauty– if you pay attention and if there’s anything I know about you Garance… you pay attention. You guys are going to love it, and you’ll find your balance, and adjust, and see the differences in culture beneath the surface. It’s not perfect but it’s pretty close ;)

    Welcome :))

  • Veronica January, 17 2017, 1:27 / Reply

    Wow Garance, your words reflect the exact same feelings I had a few years ago, when I finally left London. I couldn’t afford to buy a place and felt exhausted all the time. I moved to a quieter but still vibrant town, bought a small house with a garden, met my fiance and got a cat. I can now see green fields from my windows, with cows!! It’s great! But… I miss my old friends. It’s been hard to break into a new work circle, and to meet people I really connect with. Travel back to London is expensive and a hassle and I’ve ended up shuttling between the two places more than I ever thought I would (work, family, birthdays, reunions – there’s always a reason…). And somehow I’m working harder than ever (I’m freelance, so it’s hard to say no). Oh, and when you live in a nice place, everyone wants to come and stay, collapses with exhaustion and need some serious pampering! I don’t regret it for a moment but I’ve realised it can be hard to manage a work-life balance anywhere!

  • Hélène January, 17 2017, 1:31 / Reply

    Oh, merci Garance! Juste les mots que j’avaient besoin d’entendre en ce moment… Merci pour ce partage! Belle vie à LA!!

  • I never leave comments but I can’t help myself here. I have been listening to your podcasts and as I read this I could hear the joy and comfort in your voice. I am a firm believer in finding your true self and it looks as though you have found it in LA. I wish you all good things as I know they will come to you in your HAPPY STATE. Enjoy.

  • mademoisellemauve January, 17 2017, 1:44 / Reply

    bravo, bravo ! tu es une fille du soleil Garance, LA semble très très bien. je suis moi aussi dans le recul et l’envie de quitter un peu Paris :) hâte de lire tes prochains posts inspirés par ce nouveau cadre !

  • Congratulations! I am so glad you gave LA a chance. I grew up in the South, lived in NYC for a few years and loved it and said I’d never leave. Then, like you, I grew tired of the hardness of the place. I wanted nature and beauty and got tired of the constant stress. I moved to LA and was very happy there for a long time. I often think that LA “haters” just haven’t found “their” LA. I agree with those who’ve commented that the trick is to find an area that suits you. Even though you can travel all over the city, it’s awfully nice to have a part that’s yours so you can create a life there. I ultimately decided to move back to the South – much less expensive, and I like the easy pace, and having more of a social network. The Gulf Coast, with its water climate and eccentricities, suits me to a t as a home base. But I still travel frequently to LA for work, and pack so much fun into each trip, and I try to get to the East Coast once every year or two, because there is nothing like fall in LA. It’s so nice to realize that you truly can create your own life, in a way that works for you. So glad that you are doing that, being open and adventurous. I think you’re inspiring others to do the same.

  • Georgiana January, 17 2017, 1:56 / Reply

    Best wishes in your new endeavor! Venice is wonderful but, yes, walking is deemed a bit odd to the locals. I remember visiting a few years back and my friend asking me how I got to Abbott Kinney Blvd. from the Marina, assuming I Übered it. When I told her I walked, I thought she’d never stop laughing. :)

  • Dear Garance,

    I can so well relate to much of what you say about life in New York. I lived there for 12 years (after growing up in the Hamptons) and so often felt exhaustion mixed with the desire to do and be more. There is no limit! The energy is contagious, but it’s hard to find balance and peace of mind. I now live in Paris and still miss the city dearly as it’s a part of me and helped me to become who I am, but it’s a longing of my ego, the way my soul craves Paris and Europe. That’s how I make sense of it.

    How true that “You can’t just watch your life go by, passively, exhausting yourself to find comfort in the uncomfortable.”

    Wishing you best of luck on your new chapter in LA! Hoping to meet you there or in Paris one day. Bises.

  • You are responsible for your own happiness…and for the harder part…figuring out what that means. You’ve begun.

  • Super poste. Honnête et intime comme je les aime. Bravo.

  • Thank you, Garance. “You can’t just watch your life go by, passively, exhausting yourself to find comfort in the uncomfortable.” As always, thank you for your candor and sincerity, for sharing with your readers significant moments in your life, and for allowing us to learn from the knowledge you’ve gained as you’ve gone through things that we can relate to. You are such an encouragement! All good things to you as you begin the next chapter of your life on the West Coast (it’s the best)!

  • Asha Moorthy January, 17 2017, 2:46 / Reply

    Hey Garance! Congratulations!!! My sister and I remember our conversations with you about moving to LA!!!…So happy to learn you’ve taken the plunge! I actually just did so as well – finally decided to stay in LA (where I grew up) after a decade in New York :)! Totally understand your thoughts on the move. Very excited for you!

  • welcome. Hope to run into you in Venice

  • I moved back to california after 6 yrs in nyc. first venice, where I didn’t have a car for a year, just a bike. now up the coast not quite to malibu. kind of like corsica I bet. as you described, lunches on the patio with a 24/7 view of the pacific, friends who never want to leave. paradise.

  • Ahhh! You made the switch Garance, welcome to LA :) I have been living here for about 14 years (originally from Venezuela) and I also was reminded of my city’s vegetation, the smells, the pace… It was hard to adjust the first year because like you at 16 I was trying to find its center and logic, and then one find day everything clicked. I am a fashion designer and always thought I could not make it unless I lived and suffer NYC, but happy to say that I couldn’t think of a better place to be an emerging designer right now. Of course I go back and forth to NYC and do market and all that, and love it! But at the fifth day or so I am longing to come back to my yard, my dog and slow dinners with friends at home :) I wish you all the best on your new adventure! Venice is like a foreign land to me as well as I’ve always lived on the east side, you have a lot of options in this vast city! xx

  • I knew you would move to L.A. Ever since you went there and were so taken by it, by the sun, by the vibe. As you say, it’s more like the south of France than New York is.
    I also loved NYC and left. I had the wrong accent (Midwestern, not exotic), hadn’t gone to the “right” schools, no family influence/money, not thin enough and never would be. I met many wonderful people in NYC, but also plenty who wasted no time in putting me in my place, reminding me that I wasn’t a real New Yorker, no matter how many years I spent there and how well I knew the place. I felt, at best, tolerated. I also had bad manners by inviting people to my little apartment for home-cooked dinners; more than one invitee told me that such behavior just wasn’t done because most people didn’t have enough space to entertain and even when they had space they didn’t know how to cook. (I think this has changed with the whole foodie trend.)
    And now, I live in the south of France. The good life, Garance, the good life.

  • I CANT believe this! G takes LA! Thanks for doing this as you prove us all that its actually OK to make a change and its OK to be scared. Life is so surprising and we need to let us surprise. Enjoy ur new life and keep sharing funny details!

  • So you moved to LA to move away from this?

    “Because in New York, you’re never enough. There’s always something or someone more pretty, more successful, skinnier, younger…”

    It’s so much worse there with that.

  • Benedicte January, 17 2017, 3:20 / Reply

    La première fois que je suis allée à LA, je n’ai rien compris, pas aimé et continué mon voyage. Et 15 ans après, j’ai a-do-ré ! La lumière, la mer, la végétation, le way of life… J’espère y revenir bientôt

  • Loved this post. I recently moved to London from sunny Perth, Western Australia with endless sunshine and glorious beaches. Struggling to find my groove in such a big city and long to escape from all the car fumes, cigarette smoke and dreary weather. Your post made me rethink what I really want and what am I really chasing. I know life is all about compromise and choice: big city career opportunities versus health & quality of life – just wish I could have both. Look forward to reading more about your transition to LA!

  • Best of luck to both of you! From my experience living in NYC, there is something that makes people, well, angry…I couldn’t really understand Carry Bradshaw’s temperament, cursing at cabs and screaming at strangers, until I moved there and felt myself seething in ways that were unrecognizable to my family. Too many people, too much concrete, too much shadow.

  • virginie January, 17 2017, 3:45 / Reply

    Garance
    Première fois de ma vie que j écris un commentaire ici. Nous avons des gens en commun de paris de l’époque. ..barefootcomtessa…tout ça bref. Tout ça pour dire que tu es juste superbe intérieurement de partager ces réflexions si nécessaires et ce saut dans le vide. J’aurai tant à échanger avec toi au plus profond de mon coeur. Vis va deviens et continue.
    sI chaleureusement
    virginie

  • “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”… Je suis toujours émue lorsque je voix quelqu’un agir en synchronicité avec ce qu’est la vie, la vraie. Je l’ai déjà dis dans ton premier post à ce sujet, c’est quelque chose de tellement personel que vu de l’extérieur on ne peut qu’apprécier une partie de cette réalité. Quoiqu’il arrive vous avez tous les deux le mérite de vous avoir écouté. Si simple, effrayant parfois mais toujours bénéfique.

  • Merci! Merci, merci, merci merci merci de partager tout ça :-xxx

  • Alors pour Garance et Chris : Juste un “bon vent” !! Si on ne fait rien, il ne se passe rien…prendre des décisions qui vont changer nos vies c’est fort, courageux aussi…
    Bisettes de Paris

  • “Choosing happiness? Do we really have the right to do that?”
    OF COURSE!!!!

    “There’s no way of knowing what’s best for you if you don’t try.”
    SO TRUE!!!

  • “Choosing happiness? Do we really have the right to do that?”
    OF COURSE!!!!

    “There’s no way of knowing what’s best for you if you don’t try.”
    SO TRUE!!!

    Thank you so much!!!

  • Beautiful post.
    After having lived and ‘raced’ in London for 6 years, which also felt like a ‘Peter Pan’ city, I left it all to go travelling and settle down in a tiny coastal village.
    A year later, the comforting (or depressing?) thing is to see that London has not changed at all since I left, its buzz is still there and will probably always be. But now, it is just available on demand – whenever needed.
    Happy new life Garance!

  • Thank you! :)

  • “…Et que là tout de suite, telle que je vous écris depuis la terrasse du café Superba à Venice, mon chien endormi à mes pieds, je me sens, égoïstement, tellement bien”

    Pourquoi “égoïstement” tellement bien, hein ?
    – Tu as déjà “quitté” ta famille (et le monde ne s’est pas arrêté de tourner ni pour eux, ni pour toi…Et vous avez tous l’air, à te lire, d’aller bien)
    – Tu es à L.A avec ton amoureux (et futur mari) et ton chien (endormi à tes pieds)
    (- Et à voir, tu n’as abandonné personne à N.Y).
    – …

    PROFITE !

    PS Et de plus merci…car ce commentaire n’est rien d’autre qu’une autosuggestion, un mantra, destiné à mes propres questionnements

  • SUNSHINE January, 17 2017, 5:25 / Reply

    Tellement inspirant ! Merci Garance.

  • Tawny Summer January, 17 2017, 5:37 / Reply

    Ahhh! Welcome to LA!!! You’re perfect for the westside and we’re lucky to have you!

  • Happy for you Garance :)

  • Bonjour Garance, Tes textes sont la raison pour laquelle je reviens sur ton blog encore et encore. Quelle justesse a chaque fois. Certains de tes textes (celui sur tes 40 ans) m’ont fait reflechir bien après les avoir lus et me rappellent qu’ici il y a beaucoup plus que de la mode. Ce changement de vie je l’ai fait il y a 3 ans et pour les memes raisons que toi, je suis passee d’une vie un peu frenetique a Paris a une vie plus slow et proche de la nature a Sydney et c’est la meilleure decision que j’ai prise… Profite de cette nouvelle page de ta vie.

  • Thanks Garance, I really needed this post. I’ve just made a similar move, but for love, not out of choice. I’m going to use you as my source of optimism that it will all work out for me on the west coast, until I actually believe it myself. Love is great, but I miss my best friends, extended family, the grittier-ness of my bigger city, etc. And now I must find a new career in middle age, since I had to leave my great little gig that was challenging and fun, and gave me international travel, enough money and lots of free time. Fingers crossed. Wishing you and Chris (and Lulu) the best in your new home!

  • Lisa loomer January, 17 2017, 7:10 / Reply

    There are millions of New Yorkers whose focus is not on how young they look or how great is their latest success or the other values often ascribed to “New York”… and it’s also true of LA. There is authenticity…reality…and the struggle to simply survive in both places. Those of us who can choose where to live are a lucky few.

  • Garance, welcome to Los Angeles, so happy for you! Enjoy our lovely town.

  • Welcome to LA!!! A lot of people are overwhelmed by the city at first – tourists don’t see the “real LA”, and sometimes it even takes living here for a couple of years to fall in love. I just passed year four, and I can safely say that this city is now magic to me. Sure, there are cons to every place you live (the grass is always greener on the other side), but LA is full of SO MUCH – in a way that isn’t as draining as New York (though I sometimes romanticize living there for a brief time). But honestly, you can’t beat the weather, the sand, the mountains, the wine, the desert, the culture, etc. etc. – truly something for everyone. It’s pricey, and I’ll probably never be able to afford a house here (though coming from NYC I imagine it feels reasonable), but you have to have some trade-offs. Anyway, all of this is to say – I am so excited for y’all. Enjoy the City of Angels. ;)
    http://www.wonderlandsam.com

  • yup-
    not just LA, but California in general, it is just a different country. there is nothing like the sun, sea, mountain, desert, nature, and *immense* creativity there–both tapped and untapped. you can find whatever you want there!

    it DOES take a while to figure it out, and it requires some maturity and personal vision to see past the negatives that people are always haranguing LA for, but then you see it for what it truly is: the world’s most diverse city– in ethnicity, food, creativity and in art in general–with the world’s most amazing array of Nature right there in front of you and easy to get to. it is a city that gives and gives; anyone who wants to, can be happy there.
    *For all large cities*, LA is truly the best one.
    and, they have great subways now–check them out!! so clean, and no NY piss!! ;)

  • Je n’ai pas l’habitude d’écrire de commentaires sur un blog, mais je voulais juste réagir a cet article…

    Merci pour toutes ces belles leçons de vie et cette sincérité d’écriture. Ce blog, que je suis depuis le début, a tellement bien évolué au fil du temps, et touche désormais, au delà de la mode, a tous les sujets qui m’intéressent dans la vie. Merci pour cette ouverture et pour les toujours plus belles images d’Erik.

    Andrane de Barry
    (Photographe)

  • Anonymous January, 17 2017, 8:33 / Reply

    New York City is what you make of it. Partying or yoga/brunch/movies are not the only two options. NYC is so much more complex and interesting than that. Changing homes won’t change your busy schedule unless you change your career. It is not New York’s fault that you didn’t have time to draw or that you never bothered to invite people over for leisurely lunches or dinner parties. There are 24 hours in each day no matter where you live. What you choose to do with those 24 hours is totally up to you, especially when you have your own business that allows you to have a flexible schedule.

    As a professional, with a full-time job, I have plenty of time to read books, take cooking classes and language classes, spend time with friends at their apartments eating good food, etc. Life is what you make of it. It sounds to me that your burnout is more from your career and how you have chosen to spend time building that career, then New York City itself, and while I wish you all the best, I don’t think simply moving to another city is going to change that.

    I can agree with you on the suffocating NYC summers, though. They are the worst part of NYC in my opinion.

  • So happy for you, Garance! To find and live your authentic life… I think you’ve found true success and the fountain of youth. Wherever you go and decide to be, you’re our girl. :) Congratulations to you and Chris on these very special and happy days. xox

  • Bravo Garance !!! :)

  • THANK YOU FOR THIS!!! I lived in Manhattan for 8 years and finally left last year after I got married and was pregnant. I couldn’t see raising a child there even though I loved the city. I tried to explain why we left to so many people and everyone just looked at us sideways. We moved down south and you can BREATHE here. You captured it so perfectly. Thank you :)

  • It is a good move Garance ! Not to come in LA specificallly but to do something and to try something new, different, maybe better for you right now.
    I am also french (but from Paris) spent years in NYC and now I am in LA. I am not advocating for LA since I, personnaly, don’t really like this city : the lack of culture (to my point of view at least), the crazy time in cars, the monotony of it. But the weather is amazing (not the past week – it RAINS !- but usually it is) and the landscape around beautiful. But there is car always and I hate them. Venice is a good place to be anyway. But around you are the giant highways…
    Anyway, there is little gem in LA, hard to find, less obvious than in NYC. Maybe you can go for a treasur hunt :)

  • It is a good move Garance ! Not to come in LA specificallly but to do something and to try something new, different, maybe better for you right now.
    I am also french (but from Paris) spent years in NYC and now I am in LA. I am not advocating for LA since I, personnaly, don’t really like this city : the lack of culture (to my point of view at least), the crazy time in cars, the monotony of it. But the weather is amazing (not the past week – it RAINS !- but usually it is) and the landscape around beautiful. But there is car always and I hate them. Venice is a good place to be anyway. But around you are the giant highways…
    Anyway, there is little gem in LA, hard to find, less obvious than in NYC. Maybe you can go for a treasure hunt :)

  • Hi Garance,

    I really enjoyed this post. I’ve lived in NY for 6 years, and your post put words to the many emotions that have started to circulate in my mind. I’ve been following your blog since you’ve started, and I truly appreciate all the heart and truth that you put out in the world through your blog. I wish you all the best in LA!

  • Congratulations on your move. You mention the ocean and the mountains but don’t forget the desert..Joshua Tree is just two hours away, Palm Springs too. Enjoy! you will become the best version of yourself here.

  • I enjoyed your post immensely. I was born and raised in Southern Cali. I believe we live in the most amazing place in the world. Having lived in New York (Houston/2nd/LES) during my residency, I, too, fell in love with NYC. It’s so easy. But home called me back. Welcome home.

  • Garance this is BRILLIANT!!!
    I love how you took this decision, and I think it really suits your current lifestyle and mindset (one can really see how much you’ve changed in the last 2 years or so by reading your posts ;) ).

    You know, I’ve been thinking about this a lot too: what if I just choose to be happy?
    But somehow when you tell it to other people they always make you feel like you’re an alien, like giving up working 12 hours a day in a frustrating job, in a place you chose only for your career was the craziest idea one could think of.
    When I was 25-29 I could only think of working 24/7 on my PhD, just to party hard and get wasted on Fridays to forget it all. It was insane, but it was OK because I was caught in the adrenaline rush of “becoming someone”. I moved to Singapore to continue my career but now, at 33, I realize I’m not in that phase anymore.
    I get home every night exhausted.
    Like you, I have no time to draw and write on my blog (which at the moment are the only things that would give me a little bit of happiness and, my shrink can confirm, mental sanity).
    I spend Sunday stressing about the Monday (result: my weekend is one day long).
    And for what?
    These days I’m really thinking, what if I die tomorrow? Is my career really the thing that I will think about on my dying bed? It’s like that guy you said, the one who wanted to stop at 45 and got depressed at 40, why wait?

    “Choosing happiness? Do we really have the right to do that?”: you really hit the spot with this sentence.

    Garance, as always, you’re being an inspiration.
    And please please continue to motivate us to change our lives too. Show us your new life in LA, make us feel that we can do it too. I really need it (and I’m sure a lot of other people here need it too).

    Good luck!

    xx Al

  • Congrats and best of luck to you and Chris! Reading your post just made me rethink of my current lifelong new yorker situation….Merci!!!

  • Quand je te lis, je ressent le même sentiment – qui a fait que j’ai choisi de rester vivre à Marseille plutôt que d’aller à Paris… Hate de voir ton chez toi à LA collègue marseillaise ;)

  • I made the move to LA from NYC 9 months ago and I’m a better person for it. I still miss NY like I miss the “bad boy” boyfriend that is completely dysfunctional and bad for me. But that doesn’t mean I dont miss and think about him every day. I will occasionally travel to see him, have a drink, go to dinner and catch a live show and if we are really pushing it find an after hours party circa 1992 …but when it’s all over with all it’s it’s crazy, toxic energy. I’ll go back to my laid back surfer, boyfriend with good hygiene a respect for nature and all living things. ( LA ) and after the age of 40 that’s what I’m signing up for. Good luck. I think you’ve made the right move…..

  • BRAVO et merci de partager cette tranche de vie avec nous, ce que tu fais depuis tant d’années sur ce blog et avec quel talent! Ton post m’a fait chaud au cœur et je suis contente pour vous et pour toi.

  • Plein de bonheur dans cette nouvelle vie ! On arrive à une certaine sérénité quand on VIT vraiment dans le présent, qu’on apprécie l’instant présent. Et qu’on oublie les “plus tard’ “quand j’aurai le temps” et tout ce qui fait qu’on parle toujours au futur.

  • Je ne vous connais pas Garance mais votre bonheur me fait plaisir! Bon vent à vous trois…

  • Florence January, 18 2017, 4:36 / Reply

    Garance, je te souhaite de bien vivre – non – de très bien vivre, en accord avec toi-même, heureuse à LA ou n’importe où, toujours avec ceux que tu aimes, mais surtout de ne jamais lésiner sur le bonheur parce que la vie est courte et qu’il faut vraiment VIVRE :) Je te souhaite de bien pendre la crémaillère et je suis admirative de voir comment tu inventes si bien ta vie!

  • Raphaele January, 18 2017, 4:51 / Reply

    Garance s il te plait est ce que tu peux expliquer mieux/ plus la magie de LA??? Ca serait incroyable que tu repondes a un post ;)
    Je ne suis jamais allee a LA mais ca ne m attire pqs du tout, il me semble que je detesterai. J ai vu plein de cilms et les fealisateurs ont l air d adoree cette ville, mais moi je vois pas…..
    J ai vecu longtemps a sydney, j imagine que c est un peu pareil mais plus magique?
    Moi qui ai tant aime Paris et adoré vivre a New York, maintenant que j ai des enfants ca ne me dis plus rien. Mais peut etre plus tard, pour l instant l’idee de re vivre en apart me donne la nausee….. les longs commutes oh no…. a chaque phase de la vie il faut vivre la ou on est bien.

  • Dear Garance,

    First of all, your website is a major inspiration for me – I visit it every day! Secondly, I am happy for you you made this move, congratulations!

  • Hi Garance!
    Je crois que tu as eu raison de faire ça, malgré le courage que cela a du te demander.
    De toute façon, ce genre de décision n’est pas irréversible, tu pourras toujours revenir à NY plus tard, ou partir ailleurs.
    Cet article est “inspiring” !!!
    Bisous !!!

  • Garance, this is such a great and insightful post. I really get it – after living in London for over 10 years I feel like you. As much as I love living in a vibrant city, I have been asking myself whether I really want to spend the rest of my life here (or even the next 10 years). The packed tube, the cold, the rain, the wind – of course it is not all black and white, we do sometimes get lovely summers that last from May until October (the last 2 years).
    But I love the idea of LA – still living in a colorful, vibrant, creative place but sunny, where you can socialise outside and with easy access to the sea.
    I am really looking forward to reading your future posts and observations on the new life.

    Good luck with everything and keep writing :) xx

    P.S. I love the South of France so I completely get it!

  • Teresa almeida ribeiro January, 18 2017, 6:39 / Reply

    be happy today! good luck :)

  • Best of luck to the three of you in LA! Looking forward to your work from there now. Good to stop and really change life patterns if you are not completely happy. We all get stuck but most don´t have the courage to do something about it. Many are hoarders- holding on to stuff that tend to hold them back. Glad that even though your blog is changing from fashion style to lifestyle, you are honest and true to yourself and that inspires attitude-style. I always thought you are more a natural, simple and down to earth girl than most fashionistas in NYC, anyways. Good to see your evolving- and still sharing your thoughts. I am going to miss seeing you in your wonderful coats, though! -(love your style and since I live in Norway- we live in coats most days in a year!)
    Hope you continue to share photos of your life -just now in LA and see how your style change. Best wishes for happiness in life to you, Chris and Lulu!

  • Also, could you please link to the post your wrote after you’d spent a month in LA? I cannot find it. Thank you!

  • helene de gasquet January, 18 2017, 6:52 / Reply

    bonjour Garance,
    les états d’âme ont toujours de l’intérêt lorsque ils sont sincères mais
    maintenant que la destination est acquise nous donner des adresses et des infos sur la ville serait génial !!!!!!

  • delphine juan January, 18 2017, 7:44 / Reply

    super !! vous allez pouvoir laisser tomber cette affreuse doudoune en peaux d’animaux (Lulu likes this ;)).

  • “Mais je sais aussi qu’il était temps de faire quelque chose. Qu’on ne peut pas regarder sa vie passer, passivement, à trouver son compte dans l’inconfort.” Je me retrouve tellement dans cette phrase et me rend compte que tu as raison,
    2017 va être plein de projets pour moi aussi…

    Profite de ce bonheur pas si égoïste car partagé avec au moins Chris et Lulu ;) J’ai hâte de te lire dans les mois qui viennent. Après les articles Paris vs NY, peut-être des NY vs LA voire Paris vs LA !

    Plein de belles choses pour la suite !

    Audrey

  • Wow, exactly the right time. This story is truly inspirational!

  • Garance, I’ve always looked up to you. Not in the oh, I want to be like her when I grow up way (because I’m more or less your age) but in the personal development, working career, taking risks and evolving way and this post has made me remember so many feelings of not belonging where I am… and made me realize you are a true role model for me. And I’m not saying this in the oh Garance I looooove you kind of superficial way but honestly, I mean it. I wish I could be more like you.
    The best of luck in this new adventure!!!
    xx,
    E.
    http://www.theslowpace.com

  • Flavia Mazelin Salvi January, 18 2017, 8:35 / Reply

    Chère Garance,

    Sachez qu’à LA, il est un restaurant corse très prisé sur Melrose appelé Napoleon and Josephine.

    Il est tenu par de vrais corses et on y mange divinement bien m’ont assuré des compatriotes qui séjournaient dans la Cité des Anges.

    Bonne installation et bon vent (bon libecciu ? ;-))

    Flavia

  • All the best luck to you both. I thought my admiration for you couldn’t be bigger! Congratulations for listening to your true self among all the noise around you. I hope you feel at home in LA.

  • Congrats on the move – It made me reflect on happiness. I don’t think that happiness can be ‘found’ in the environment, though. Happiness is, to me, an inner state of mind. You will find people who are younger, fitter, more successful and more beautiful than you in every corner of the world, not only in NY, so you can’t base your wellbeing on comparing yourself to others or what others expect from you! Also, regardless of where you live, I believe you should work on your intrinsic motivations and live the life you aim for. I am, personally, not going to base my happiness on the place I live, the space I have, or whether I have a garden or not! Not everyone has the money or the possibility to move to a bigger home or a different city, and those people shouldn’t be condemned to an unfulfilling life. Happiness is inside of you, not in the outside, not in the city you live and not in the surroundings. Thank you so much for sharing! It made me realised I am on the right track….

  • Je vais faire ma “connasse” mais je crois que j’attendais ce post depuis….que tu t’es installée à NY ! :-) Je ne sais pas mais (c’est prétentieux de dire ça car même si je te suis depuis le début, on ne se connait pas), cette vi(ll)e, ce n’était pas toi. Je suis heureuse pour toi (pour vous). Tiens et ma fille est en ce moment même à L.A (il y a le salon de la musique). Bises (je me permets)

  • Yay. Been waiting for this post. Your journey is very inspiring and validating to an artist on the west coast – well, writing blocks from you, probably;).

  • All the best Garance! I am happy that you feel more like yourself in LA. New York is just pure stress, good luck to all the people there, because they need it. When I was in my twenties, living in a big city and experience life was all I wanted to do. But as you get older the big city grind starts to wear and drag you down. I prefer my beautiful Europe now, and stay away from big cities.
    I hope you find the balance you were looking for Garance! xxx

  • Beautiful beautiful beautiful! Loved reading your words! Well done and keep on keeping on. You will never go wrong following your heart! ?

  • Congratulations on making a move that makes sense for you. I recently moved across the country from a cold, busy place to a warm place that is a bit slower and can’t believe how much more relaxed I am. There is something to be said about being in a nice climate, close to nature and being around a different pace of life. As I get older (in my 40s), my priorities keep shifting. Good luck!

  • Garance, je crois bien que c’est la première fois que je commente sur un de tes posts personnels, mais je voulais te dire à quel point ton cheminement de vie me parle et aussi me rassure : même si nos âges sont éloignés (j’ai moins de 30 ans), tes questionnements sur tes buts dans la vie et ce qui y prend plus (ou moins) d’importance sont aussi les miens. Aujourd’hui je suis à un stade de ma vie où j’ai enfin le sentiment de prendre ma vie en main et de choisir le bonheur, parce que c’est vrai, pourquoi attendre ? Bref, merci de partager tous ces questionnements, tes erreurs aussi parfois, qui me font réaliser que c’est tout à fait normal dans une vie bien remplie ;)

  • Virginie January, 18 2017, 1:53 / Reply

    Il y a deux ans lors de mon voyage en Californie j ai beaucoup beaucoup aimé los angeles alors que 10 ans avant pas du tout. Si je me voyais expatriée au US je m imaginais que nyc. A L.A J ai particulièrement apprécié la tranquillité de Manhattan beach, l’animation de santa Monica et les brunch aux farmers market. J’arrive du coup à comprendre ton attrait pour cette ville.

  • THIS IS AMAZING!! I am so, so happy for you. I can feel how good it feels through your post to actually put you and Chris first, above all else and you are flowing with happiness and creativity. It is such a wonderful example to your readers that setting down boundaries and prioritizing yourself can be a great thing :) Thanks Garance for showing us the authentic way, per usual.

  • Zsuzsanna January, 18 2017, 3:26 / Reply

    Wishing you guys, all the best in LA. Sometimes we (all) have to be selfish for ourselves, there won’t be anyone else “selfish” instead of us, right?! I am sure that anything that feels right for you, is really rights as well.

  • Welcome to LA!!! <3

  • Hi Garance, your post is very inspiring…they always are! I was born and raised in Madrid and found myself living in No. Cal at age 23. After living there for almost 10 years, I decided to move back home and stayed 6 years. Then, love took me back to California, but this time it was LA where I chose to live, and yes, as you say in your post, I found myself saying like “I can’t believe this!…” Now, I’m back in Spain (been back for 15 years) but this time I chose a sunny mid-size coastal town in eastern Spain and looooove it here! Looong story short,(laughs) life is about constant soul searching. Nonetheless, as they say “home is where the heart is”.

    Enjoy your new life in LALALA! ;-)

  • Brava!! I can wholly relate that to my life – how will you know if you don’t try? It may be scary, but life is too short for not taking risks. Hope you have an amazing life in LA!! (LOVE Superba in Venice!)

  • Catherine January, 18 2017, 6:01 / Reply

    Bienvenue a LA, j espere te rencontrer en personne un jour prochain! Tu peux ranger tes beaux manteaux maintenant ;-). Félicitations!

  • After reading your blog for many years on your life in NY, it would be really fun to spot you in Venice or roaming around somewhere in LA! Best wishes to you!

  • YAY! Welcome to LA! you made the right choice! I almost got sucked in NYC but LA captured my heart!

    http://www.asummeroflove.com

  • YAY! Welcome to LA! you made the right choice! I almost got sucked in NYC but LA captured my heart!

    enjoy your new lifestyle :)

    http://www.asummeroflove.com

  • J’ai du mal à décider pour quelque chose et vous m’avez inspiré juste le bon moment, merci beaucoup.

  • coeur avec les mains

  • Quelle chance de pouvoir être à LA! J’aime le changement et je crois que je ne supporte pas la routine dans une ville. Bon c’est vrai que je pars de loin et que je suis dans une ville très difficile et qu’on est loin de LA et j’ai fait un gros sacrifice en venant m’installer dans le nord est de la France par amour! mais ça y est le climat et l’ennui de cette ville ont eu raison de moi! Je prévois de partir m’installer dans le sud!
    Good luck in LA je pense que tu as fait le bon choix!

  • I teared up a little. Brava ! I admire your strength to change, not settle and be in tune with your feelings. Finding what works for you and listening to your gut is so important! It is a hassle moving – changing cities, your life, but in the end, when we are in tune with ourselves I think those moves are fundamental. Example: not finding an apartment to buy? That is such a sign that it wasn’t right for you. Not having energy? Def time to move.
    I am American but have lived in Italy for years. I always wonder… where will I land? This is super cheesy, but I think we just have to enjoy the journey, not think about the destination. I am enjoying my time here and if I stay for life ok, and if I start getting signals its time to leave I will know I am strong enough to do it because I have lived in many places in the world.
    I am so happy for you and even happier that you share you story with us.
    Good luck and good vibes your way for everything that comes.

  • Even though (or maybe specifically because) I only spent three months working in NYC this summer for the first time in my life, this post really resonated with me. The fact that anything is possible really means that you have no excuse to fall short, and that puts a lot of pressure on people to succeed. It was really a hustle, until I went to LA and saw how laid back everything was in comparison. Such an insightful post, thank you Garance, and most of all, good luck!

  • courtney January, 19 2017, 8:43 / Reply

    Congrats on your move Garance! I really needed to read this. I just moved to Asia because my family needed me back here after being in NY for over 13 years. I’ve been back for almost half a year now, and there is not a day that I don’t think about moving back to NY. I know that this is not an option for me now because my family needs me.
    Where you said “You can’t just watch your life go by, passively, exhausting yourself to find comfort in the uncomfortable,” really hits the spot for me.

    I think it’s great that you can feel a little selfish and of course you have the right to choose happiness! :) I know that one day when the timing is right for me again I will be able to choose my own happiness and be okay to feel a little selfish and move back to NY. Thank you for a great post Garance

  • Félicitations Garance! Et merci pour ce superbe texte, ça fait réfléchir!
    xo
    http://fashioniseverywhere.com/

  • ikekepania January, 19 2017, 10:18 / Reply

    Bravo pour ce texte qui vient du coeur, qui vient des tripes, bonne chance a Venice et Pace e Salute!

  • C’est beau ce que tu écris. Je suis très émue. A une période de ma vie un peu transitoire, mais qui fait épanouie de l’extérieur, cela fait un bien fou de te lire depuis tant d’année et de voir que tu trouves ton bonheur :)
    Bravo pour tout, et surtout ne change rien ! On attends le second livre avec impatience !
    Léonor

  • Lisa Walker January, 19 2017, 12:39 / Reply

    Oh, great joy! You are in my neighborhood! Welcome to the chill life… You made a great decision.

  • I am SO happy for you, Garance! I too am making a move solely based on my happiness to a brand new city with no idea of how it will pan out. And it’s such a gorgeous feeling! Here’s to a softer, sweeter, more authentic life — no matter where you are.

  • So sincerely happy for you, Garance. Thank you for being a model of authenticity and courage in the quest for true happiness (which you, and all of us, DO deserve)!

  • I have been reading you … forever? Close to forever? And just now commenting! I am and have always been inspired by your blog, your writing, your art, and your ability to project what seems like your charmingly true and authentic self into The Internet.

    So happy to hear of your move, as I also moved from NYC to LA last year. My life has changed so dramatically for the better that it’s impossible to describe. So, welcome :)

  • Ces articles sont de loin mes favoris Garance. Toi et ton honnêteté, ta franchise sur ces moments délicats du quotidien.

  • J’avais presque l’impression d’être égoïste, tiens.

  • Wish you the best of luck Garance.. its been a long time since my last visit on your blog, I totally forgot how much I liked your posts. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this one and appreciate your honesty so much..I can relate to lot of things you wrote… Looking forward to read about your LA adventures.

  • How wonderful! I am so, so jealous (but in a happy way!) because you are now living my dream life. I am also tired of New York. I am also in love with LA (and specifically Venice, which felt like home the minute I got there). I’m saving up to leave but it will take a few years. In the meantime, I’ll live vicariously through you. :) Enjoy your life in sunny, beautiful Southern California. ;)

  • Le Bazhaar January, 20 2017, 8:32 / Reply

    Whaouh!! felicitations et belle vie a LA, il y a effet quelque chose de magique dans cette ville :)
    http://www.lebazhaar.com

  • I will be exactly like you the day I’ll buy my dream house there…

  • yay, welcome to Venice! xo :)

  • Welcome beautiful soul! I am L A. native, and, this city has so much to offer a creative like yourself and Chris. Yes, like all cities, we have some ugliness, some disingenuous people, but, the varieties in culture, food, art, and music will always prevail. You, my dear, will thrive here, I know it because you are here as your authentic self. So embrace it with vigor! Welcome!

  • Merci Garance pour ces mots justes. Vous arrivez si bien à exprimer vos sentiments, à partager vos pensées et à nous offrir tous ces moments de vie. Bravo!

  • This might be my favorite post of yours ever. I can picture how you think and feel about this so well.

    All the best to you!
    A New Yorker

  • Garance: Your post speaks to all of those of us who are in pursuit of a better way of life, calmer, happier, but you took the leap and that is amazing and inspiring. Being honest in your pursuit and clear in your vision will reap you the most amazing rewards, I wish you and Chris all the best and look forward to all your new adventures !!!!

  • Garance: Your post speaks to all of those of us who are in pursuit of a better way of life, calmer, happier, but you took the leap and that is amazing and inspiring. Being honest in your pursuit and clear in your vision will reap you the most amazing rewards, I wish you and Chris all the best and look forward to all your new adventures !!!! Welcome to wonderful LA.

  • Hi Garance! I always love the moment when I land on the blog and see one of your illustrations… a signal that there is a beautiful and humorous confessional promised behind the link! As I’ve read the blog over the past few years, I’ve become more and more intrigued on how these illustrations come to be. A few months ago you asked your readers what we would like to hear about from you and the studio: well I would love to see these drawings come to life! Now that you’ve relocated and (hopefully, probably) have a beautiful new little home set up, I would love a sneak peek of the drawing table, your tools, and to see you at work… maybe through a video or series of photos. What a glimpse of creativity and inspiration that would be!

  • Bonjour Garance, cela fait des années que je vous lis ( bon on est pas si vieilles quand même), mais ce post m’a fait sourire tout le long….Récemment, j’ai tout quitté, Paris, ma vie, mon compagnon et je suis partie au Mexique me poser pour écrire trois mois…Avant d’emménager à LA en février ! Si jamais vous aviez besoin d’une petite assistante sympatico trilingue :) En tout cas, merci beaucoup, pour l’écriture, l’humour et la bonne humeur permanente. FINALLY plein de merveilleuses découvertes Californienne ( il faut vraiment s’inscrire au LA architecture tour qui parfois ouvre des maison de Neutra, Eames etc… ) !

  • I love love love this post! Merci Garance! I’m so inspired to look at my own life over the last few years…ok maybe the last 10 years, where I feel like I’ve been on a merry-go round that has at times been a fun joyful ride, and others been more like riding the spin cycle in a washing machine, but a ride where I continue to see flashes of both familiar and sometimes enticing scenery flash by as I spin around. But off in the distance I keep catching a glimpse of the horizon gleaming with promise and calling me to explore! The once comfortable and fun merry-go-round is definitely getting uncomfortable ands starting to make me perhaps a little nauseous now so I’m questioning why I’ve stayed on so long? And how much longer will I let myself be here? And I can see I’ve absolutely been enticed by many options that the world has placed in front of me, telling me I ‘must try’…’have to have’….’the essential…whatever’! Well I think it’s time to get off this ride and get myself ready to ride on over that horizon…it’s the only way I’ll find out what’s over there xx

  • Dear Garance,
    you’re at your best when you write personal thought like this! I appreciate your honesty and your fun way of telling stories.
    It’s so much better than many of the seemingly random posts that do not have much sense for me, because all they do is present a bag, e.g. – no added value… that’s what I personally think, no offense…
    Please share more of your life in LA and how you feel about this change in your life!
    Enjoy,
    kind regards,
    Nani

  • Rébecca January, 24 2017, 2:13 / Reply

    Waouh! c’est bon de lire tout ça. Cette évolution. J’apprécie. Je réfléchis du coup à mes choix. Merci.

  • As a native New Yorker, I feel your struggle, as have been in the southwest most of my adult life. New York is always there to return to. May life bring much happiness and rich adventure. That is what matters…!

  • Claere Kay January, 24 2017, 11:07 / Reply

    I wish you all the very very best and I hope LA becomes truly your home. I live in Sydney and love the connection with ocean, trees, vegetable gardens, and sunshine (but we still have a kind of winter) that allows me to be outside all year suits me perfectly! Good luck :)

  • Coucou Garance! Welcome to the West Coast. Yes, we’re a bit more relaxed and life is “softer” here but I think it’s a wonderfully enriching experience to live on both sides of the country. I am a California girl through and through – my heart belongs in LA – and I have often wondered if I was missing out by never taking the chance and moving to NYC when I was younger! And Venice is one of my favorite places ever – little bit of a hippie vibe with a touch of luxury. Hope to run into you around town someday, I’ve been a fan of yours for quite some time. Bonne chance! bx

  • So happy for you, Garance. As someone who also hated LA the first several times I visited, I also agree that it’s become a lovely refuge for me too. Just one question though… why not back to Paris?

  • Absolutely love this; it resonates very well with me at this moment. After having lived in Belgium for the past 3 years (which has completely sucked the life out of me; what a boring-ass, cold and distant country this is!), I have decided to move to Bali from April onwards. Being a freelance copywriter, it finally dawned on me I can just work where-ever the ef I want- and I’m going to. It’s such a liberating process! All the best to you, Garance; keep searching.

  • I’m so excited you’re on the West Coast now! What a brave change! I’m a West Coaster through and through but I still get to NYC every chance I get!

  • Welcome!!!! As a born and raised Angeleno I have to tell you how happy I am that you’re here! Once you find the rythym, and you will, you’ll really like it. Even when things are awful, you can go to that special spot by the ocean that you love, or go on that hike that always clears your head, and the sun will warm you and you’ll feel grounded again. At least that’s how it’s always been for me! PS Venice is lovely and gritty at the same time – the essence of LA – nice choice!

  • Sylvia Nicole Sanchez February, 6 2017, 6:00 / Reply

    So many points in common Garance! … and i’m sure more readers too!!
    Bisous et de quoi être super fière de toi!!
    Sylvia

  • Welcome to LA Garance! My husband and I moved to LA from the east coast about 3 years ago, and it was a BIG change. But, the longer we’ve stayed the more we don’t want to go back. LA has a funny way of seducing you, the beaches, close proximity to beautiful nature, amazing food and culture, and of course the weather! Yea, the traffic is a bummer, and getting around can be a pain in the ass, but who cares? We’re in LA!

  • I LOVE this post. It’s so honest and gorgeous… loved reading xx

  • Merci Garance…. je suis très contente pour toi, un abrazo fuerte ! Joli dessin.

  • Shireen Bora February, 19 2017, 6:55 / Reply

    When you have people you love around you (it will take TIME to build your circle in LA) a job that you actually like and a sense of inner happiness, I realised you can make ANY place home. After moving from London to NY to LA to NY and back to LA all at 28, I’ve come to love my journey and learned a few things a long the way. It’s not the city itself that create’s a nice life, it’s you. A love for adventure will shape your journey, and that’s a wonderful thing.

  • “Because in New York, you’re never enough. There’s always something or someone more pretty, more successful, skinnier, younger…You can always reach higher. ”

    Oh my goodness when I read this above statement I almost fell off my seat. I lived in NYC for three years and moved back to Toronto where I was born and raised and where my family is. I always said this about NYC. I always felt like it was so difficult because there was always someone smarter, prettier, taller, wealthier, etc… It’s so hard to be content, or to find a relationship, or to find that great apartment for that matter – because there is always something better around the corner. NYC is an amazing city and I am so grateful for my experience of living there. But when you say you lived in NYC and left, people look at you strangely as if you aren’t allowed to say there is something better for ‘me’ outside of NYC. Such a bustling city, and yet I never felt lonelier there. With all the friends, the evenings out, I just never felt grounded. Wishing you the best of luck in LA. xo

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