Happy, HAPPY, happy new year!!!
I don’t know if you’re about to write down your resolutions, but I know I am not.
A whole bunch of my family is here, in my home, and I have no time for all that.
Well. Truth is, I didn’t really wait to set intentions – 2017 has been a full year of introspection and resolutions.
Exactly one year ago, Chris, Lulu and I where jumping on a plane to settle in Los Angeles and what I didn’t know at the time was that 2017 would be my toughest year ever – and at the same time, probably the most beautiful of my life.
You’ve followed a few of my adventures, even if they took so much of me that I had a hard time sharing and writing some of them. A home, no baby, a very important professional change with the launch of Atelier Doré… And a new way to work long distance.
It was steep, but 2017 also was the year where I finally found who I am.
Or at least I found a thread that could lead me to it.
Most of my life, even when it felt scary, I’ve followed my instincts and learned to trust life. It’s not always easy but it’s like an exercise – the more you do it, the more you get used to it.
But nothing could have prepared me to the giant emotional and spiritual wake up call Los Angeles pushed me into. It’s as if LA woke up my soul.
As soon as I moved here, I could feel the way this city was supporting me, embracing me with a soft and maternal energy – the opposite of New York. I also felt very quickly that it was pushing me to put all the ideas I had about myself in check and to surrender to a completely new point of view. Easier said than done.
The other day I was having a drink with a friend when he told me:
“Don’t you find this city a little bit depressing?”
I knew exactly what he was talking about – but I didn’t say anything.
If you’re not ready to welcome that strange and almost mystical energy, LA can feel empty and superficial. For me, it is nothing like that.
Here, thanks to the tough times I went through and that I am so grateful for, I am learning to stop controlling everything in my life.
I am learning to listen to the quiet voice inside of me, not the crazy angry one that was telling me that I was never enough.
I am learning to listen to what others are saying.
I am learning that I can respect my body.
I am learning that my ideas and my desires can’t please everyone. And that it actually is a very good sign.
I am learning to protect myself.
I am I learning, slowly, to own who I really am.
Of course all of this is just at its beginning.
In 2017 I also learned that being yourself is the (joyful) work of a lifetime and that the most important thing is to fall in love with our life as it is right now.
And to cherish it like a new love, a man or a woman we adore and we want to take care of in every little detail. One whose qualities we love and whose flaws make us laugh – and with whom we savor every moment, because they are the expression of our joy and our commitment.
Never to separate moments of happiness from the rest but find joy in everything.
Once you start living your life like that, it’s like falling in love everyday. Everything shines, people smile, colors get brighter and hurdles become fascinating lessons. Each moment is like a present and you can never get enough.
Falling in love with our lives is what I wish for us in 2018.
Giant warm hugs to you, from the bottom of my heart.