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I’m Getting Married

7 months ago by

I’m Getting Married

HÉ, JE VAIS ME MARIER !

Je ne vais pas faire ma timide, je suis complètement surexcitée ! D’ailleurs on va peut-être devoir inaugurer une nouvelle série de posts consacrés à mon mariage… je rigole !! (Non, pas vraiment)

Josh et moi, on s’est fiancés juste avant les vacances de Noël, ce dont j’avais envie depuis… qu’on s’est rencontrés, et maintenant, tous mes rêves de wedding planneuse vont pouvoir être exaucés…

Sauf que, pas vraiment, parce que tous les trucs estampillés mariage sont souvent ringards et mièvres, je trouve ! J’ai regardé pas mal de choses sur Pinterest, les magazines spécialisés, Google… et c’est vraiment super difficile de trouver des idées qui ne soient pas réservées aux mariées hyper-girly-froufrou. Je n’ai absolument rien contre d’ailleurs, mais je n’ai pas envie de suivre tout le protocole traditionnel, sauf que j’ai quand même besoin de ressources, de références, et que j’ai du mal à trouver ce que je veux.

Si vous avez des recommandations concernant ce qui tourne autour des préparatifs du mariage, je suis preneuse. On en est aux balbutiements, donc toute aide sera la bienvenue ! Et si vous avez envie que je vous tienne au courant de nos avancées, dites-moi, je me ferai un plaisir de partager ça avec vous.

Signé,
Bridezilla (Emily).

101 comments

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  • yes! got to rock n roll bride, its very cool! nice ring by the way…

  • Thank you Kia! The ring was a total surprise and I was so happy with it! And thank you for the recommendation! xEmily

  • Claere Kay 5 janvier 2017, 3:22 / Répondre

    Congratulations! My daughter (29) got married last year and felt very much as you did. Drove her nuts that it seemed all so cookie cutter (not to say expensive..)
    We got there though, we created an experience for everyone involved that was authentic and true to the couple and their family and friends.

    We tried to replicate our family’s holiday, celebration, hospitality vibe, how we connect and celebrate with friends and community, with the ceremony as the ‘meaning’ bit. Visual beauty was important, location and champagne was important, bride’s dress and actual vows/ceremony not so much…

    I made the wedding cakes because I have always loved making cakes for example-a baklava pistachio cake for the bride and a hazelnut chocolate torte for the groom :)

    And it was gorgeous-and not very traditional (we called her the ‘anti-bride’ as to start with she said ‘no’ to everything hahahahaha)

    Good luck and I think there is room for more non traditional wedding stories so share please!
    Claere

  • Hi Claere,

    This sounds amazing and very much like what we’re looking to do! We are hoping to get married in Cape Cod where we spend our summers, we feel so connected to the town and the beach there!
    I will definitely continue to share.
    x Emily

  • Congratulations Emily! PLEASE DO SHARE. I too am getting married (fall 2017) and will definitely use any tips you share with us. I like the Laure De Sagazan kind of bride. If you too prefer more of an European not-over-the-top style for your wedding, I recommend you do your web searches on google.fr. Good luck and enjoy the planning!

  • so chic! I could were some of these even without a wedding :)

  • That’s a great tip Laura!!! We are probably not going to get married until 2018 but knowing us, we’ll have everything planned in no-time. Congratulations on your engagement and wedding too! xx

  • Congrats! As a french girl, i would just say…. RELAX ! The coolest way you take it during the preparation time, the coolest it will be on the DDay :)
    The Lane and Hello May are great sources of inspiration.
    And I’m happy to see Laure de Sagazan name popping here, please come and visit us at our recently opened Soho Atelier!

  • Congrats! I’m getting married in April and feel the same way you do- actually I really resonated with Garance when she mentioned how low-key French weddings are and engagements in general. I’m definitely not a girly bride so I haven’t relied too much on the popular wedding blogs but instead have focused on the elements I know we wanted and worked from there- specifically, good music, a florist who specializes in loose/organic bouquets with lots of greenery, etc. It will come together! And if you need help with invitations, I’m here for ya :)

  • Thank you Carly! And congrats to you too!
    I’m lucky that Josh is a creative director so he has great taste, but this is definitely a whole new landscape for him :)
    x Emily

  • Yes, this. It’s the only thing I looked at.

    My biggest advice is this: weddings are unnecessarily stressful. Most of the time they involve tears and family drama and very little time with the person you’re marrying. It’s the biggest, most stressful hosting job of your life.

    Separate the wedding/marriage part from the hosting. Elope, and have a huge party after. Then you can actually enjoy yourself and your partner, and without worrying if drunk Aunt Eloise is going to publicly drag the biggest family skeleton into the light on your first day being married. And you can enjoy hanging with friends and family without feeling like you’re ignoring the man you married two hours ago.

    We combined our honeymoon and ceremony in Jamaica, and had a rollicking vineyard reception a few weeks later. It was awesome, and everyone loved it, and we enjoyed every minute.

  • I want to know everything, plus see the pics of the day!! How exciting for you :)

  • Félicitations !! Of course we want you to share ! :)

  • Congratulations! Quick tip from a VERY happily married lady:
    plan for the marriage not just the wedding (as I’m sure you already know), and map everything out with your future husband first and then go crazy pinning and googling and reserving; best he’s involved every step of the way(assurance he’ll be involved every step of the way).
    http://brooklynchateau.blogspot.com/2016/01/wife-of-brooklyn-beauty-reals.html

  • Hi Crystal,
    So funny you say that! We agreed not to talk about it too much for at least a month, but as soon as we broke down we immediately jumped into talking about things like joint bank accounts and our wills and education for our future children. It was actually really refreshing that those were the things that were more important to us to talk about first rather than the wedding! We’ve been together for a long time so there weren’t any surprises, but things have totally changed now that we know we’re doing this. And lucky for me, Josh is a creative director so he loves to be involved in this kind of stuff! xx

  • my absolute favorite wedding site (which i still read after 2+ years of marriage, because the content is so GOOD), is apracticalwedding.com. they are advocates for having a wedding that is meaningful for the couple personally, even if that means bucking traditions (or not)! i got married with two witnesses at city hall, so it was nice to read some people say that it was okay to not want all the hoopla… but if you want the hoopla, then by all means, have at it.

    ALSO, CONGRATULATIONS!!!

  • Can’t wait to check it out! x

  • Congrats :D
    All you need is here https://www.facebook.com/IdeiasdeVeludo/ :)

  • I am dying to know where that gorgeous ring is from!

  • Hi Marie,
    Josh designed the ring himself! He worked with a friend from college who is a jeweler here in the diamond district and they started from scratch. It was a total shock and we had never really spoken about what I wanted but I am over the moon with what he did, I absolutely love it. If you ever need the name of the jeweler just let me know! x

  • Love My Dress is an absolutely amazing wedding blog (not even embarrassed to admit I’ve been reading it since long before I had a boyfriend) – some of the weddings are cutesy, but some are absolutely awesome. Three of my favourites are: http://www.lovemydress.net/blog/2016/01/belle-bunty-cool-east-london-wedding-ace-hotel-shoreditch.html
    http://www.lovemydress.net/blog/2016/04/colourful-rainbow-wedding-dress-cool-quirky-london-pub-winter-wedding.html
    http://www.lovemydress.net/blog/2015/03/richard-nicoll-wedding-dress-jumper-fashion-journalist-bride-scottish-wedding.html

  • I love the giddiness I hear in your post! Thanks for not being shy about it.

    I would love to keep hearing about ways you are moving along in this process. I am also interested in intentionally done weddings.

  • CONGRATULATIONS EMILY !!!!!! PLEASE do share! I’m getting married Aug/Sept 2018 and feel exactly like you. Everyone has been asking me about wedding stuff (we got engaged end of Oct.) and I haven’t looked at a single thing, set a date or anything in between, apart from pinning a couple of things to pinteres that happened to show up on my feedt. All I know, and I find it helps, is to think of the emotions, feelings, and energy of the wedding / day. Everything else (I hope) will fall into place….. With the amount of love that radiates between the couple, and the lifetime ahead, all the details will never truly matter. Congrats again + lots of love and light your way. Lisa xx

  • Congratulations! I got married last year and felt the very same way as you. I googled « alternative bride » more times than I can count. My aesthetic was to keep things really clean and simple. I loved this insta from Vince (https://www.instagram.com/p/99wCE-H5Ou/?taken-by=vince) and kind of went from there as far as decor. My suggestion would be to gather inspiration from brands that you connect with rather than sifting through Pinterest. I’m sure NYC has some amazing bridal shops, but if you ever find yourself in SF/LA, LOHO Bride carries a beautiful range of dresses (http://www.lohobride.com/). We also got ordered our cakes from Whole Foods and our florist quickly styled them up with some flowers. Super easy and economical! Also, don’t be afraid to say no! Everyone wants to offer opinions/help (and are doing it with love!), but if it doesn’t feel like you, don’t feel pressure to give in to make others happy! Good luck and have fun planning!

  • Congratulations!!!

    I found The Lane an invaluable resource for inspiration of the non cookie cutter kind: http://thelane.com/style-guide/themes/glacial

    Also from these talented photographers websites:
    http://niravpatelphotography.com/galleries/

    http://www.joshuamikhaiel.com/blog/

    My husband and I had such a fun time organizing our wedding and hope you guys do too!

  • Read « A Practical Wedding » and nothing else.

  • I just got married, and my number one rec is to keep it small and intimate. Invite the people you really, really love. What you’ll value after the wedding isn’t the dress, etc. — it’ll be seeing people who love, people who maybe never met before, all in one space celebrating love.

  • Definitely check out A Practical Wedding (apracticalwedding.com) – it helped me so much, and I even still read the blog 2.5 years after my wedding. It has a lot of great resources, as well as ways to make your wedding more « you » and less « wedding industry. » Also… the best advice I have is that if something stresses you out – skip it!

  • Congratulations, Emily! Enjoy being engaged — this is the best time. I just got married in October and even though wedding planning was a bear, it was so worth it.

    I was a wedding magazine editor for years learned a ton about what’s truly necessary at a wedding, which came in handy this past year. The biggest tips I learned were how to save money. I wrote a blog post about it here if you’re interested: http://artofwore.com/blog/2016/12/31/how-to-have-an-awesome-wedding-without-going-broke

  • So incredibly happy for you both! Lots of people say to separate the wedding from the marriage. However, I think that depends on how your families function. Sometimes, couples need to have weddings tied to their parents friends as well… whilst other couples have the freedom to not think of anyone else, but just whom the couple themselves would like to be there.

    I’m Asian, so my wedding twenty years ago was partially tied into what my Mum was keen to have. So, I decided to balance her weeeidng needs with my then fiancé’s and mine. I had three quarters of it at my parents’ home for immediate family and our very close friends, and the rest at a restaurant that included the colleagues and close friends of my parents.

    The modified Hindu ceremony at 6:30am in our living room, with the priest, the central fire ? (!!) around which my husband-to-be, brother, sister-and-law and I linked pinkies and circled was with immediate family and a handful of very close friends, and followed by a light breakfast together.

    Lunch and a huge, sentimental singing jam with our musician friends was had in my parents’ idyllic backyard, with tables and chairs, under clear blue skies, towering olive trees and black and white striped umbrellas that my brother had had for his wedding four years previously (I just went to the same hire company and asked for the exact same fit-out: no angst, super-easy, as I felt whoever cared about the cutlery being the same as my brother’s wedding probably won’t be invited). It was so much fun with extended family, as many of our seventy friends and cousins there, as well as a handful of interstate guests (good fiends of my parents) who hadn’t actually been invited due to the rarity with which we’d seen them in the past twenty years – but they’d kept in touch via phone, and re-met at one of their mutual friends funeral the previous year), but who’d been so excited to hear I was getting married that they turned up the night before at my parents’ place!

    Dinner was for all the older guests and my parents’ friends and colleagues, and my husband’s and my colleagues and a small handful of our very closest friends.

    It was a long, but beautiful and quite relaxed day that was spent with people who loved my husband, my parents and I deeply. I asked everyone of the guests that day to dress in whatever made them feel happy. When my maid-of-honour (my sister-in-law) asked what she should wear (I hadn’t told her up until the week before our marriage, since I hadn’t yet got my wedding outfit together), I said the same to her: « wear whatever makes you feel beautiful ». I organised our wedding (because my husband was living interstate at the time) from start to finish, in five weeks. My best friend’s fourteen year old sister and I handmade all the wedding invitations in three days.

    There wasn’t any online service for weddings back then. You just had a plethora of fluffy magazines to go through, that I deliberately eschewed in favour of going along with inspiration from dance productions we had recently done. I didn’t want meringue fluffy. I wanted richly colourful, international, intimate, joyful. We had all that, with our gorgeous guests, our fusion style ceremony and food and white and yellow orchids, my husband’s amazing Indian inspired cream silk embroidered wedding outfit (ha, he sounds more bridal than I did), my mixed Nepalese, slightly north Indian/partially traditional Chinese skirt, top and Nepalese woolen vest, and all that joy came not from the magazines, but from our friends and family.

  • Congratulations Emily! I think the blog is now defunct but East Side Bride was a welcome breath of fresh air when I was engaged. Best of luck with the planning!

  • Me too, that blog was great! Smart, funny, and the opposite of the frou-frou girly wedding stuff. Also more stylish (at least to my taste) and less sentimental than the blog A Practical Wedding that many have mentioned. The creator of ESB (a film director) did stop blogging, but the site is still up and I think could still be useful.

  • Me too, that blog was great! Smart, funny, and the opposite of frou-frou. Also more stylish (at least to my taste) and less sentimental than the blog A Practical Wedding that many have mentioned. The creator of ESB (a film director) did stop blogging, but the site is still up and I think could still be useful.

  • Congratulations! :). (I also love your ring).
    If you want to find visual inspiration for some more less « girly – frou-frou » weddings this might be a good place to take a look:
    http://jonaspeterson.com/
    (It’s a website of a wedding photographer and he has documented some really beautiful and stereotypical weddings).

    Good luck with the planning!

  • My favourite thing about this post is that you said you wanted to marry your fiance as soon as you met him.

    I’ve had a lot of relationships (currently single) and have not felt anything close to that with any of them. So it’s nice to hear that that is possible.

    Congratulations, do share!

  • Congratulations !
    I have founded a lots of inspiration on blog from spain (cherubina, and many others that i don t remember) and from french blogs (« une mariée ni quiche no tarte », « la mariée aux pieds nus » ….).
    Enjoy the preparation and try to keep it simple !

  • Caroline Dé 6 janvier 2017, 4:53 / Répondre

    Oh no PLEASE, tell us EVERYTHING. No recommendations to give you unfortunately but I’m so happy for you! It’s a bit the same with Garance, I’ve followed your growth since you started working at the Studio and there you are… engaged and sooo important to garancedore.com – massive congratulations for this engagement!

  • Caroline Dé 6 janvier 2017, 4:55 / Répondre

    PLEASE, tell us EVERYTHING, I’m so happy for you! I have no recommendations to give you unfortunately but I feel a bit moved. It was the same with Garance, I’ve followed you guys from the beginning, even you when you started working for Garance and look at you now – engaged and sooo important for this site and the Studio.

    Congratulations again and keep us posted :) !

  • Congratulations! That’s a gorgeous diamond! All the best for your wedding planning! Sophie x

    sophiehmstewart.com

  • Oh congratulations! x

    Jessica — NinetyCo 

  • Have a look at http://www.desideespourunjolimariage.com
    It’s in french but the pictures speak for themselves.
    In France/Belgium we are much less froufrou kind of brides ?
    I got married in Stockholm 7 years ago and I would love to do it again. Remain true to yourself is my only advice. Congrats!!!!

  • Have a look at http://www.desideespourunjolimariage.com
    It’s in french but the pictures speak for themselves.
    In France/Belgium we are much less froufrou kind of brides ?
    I got married in Stockholm 7 years ago and I would love to do it again. Remain true to yourself is my only advice. Congrats!!!!

  • Have a look at http://www.desideespourunjolimariage.com
    It’s in french but the pictures speak for themselves.
    In France/Belgium we are much less froufrou kind of brides ?
    I got married in Stockholm 7 years ago and I would love to do it again. Remain true to yourself is my only advice. Congrats!!!!

  • CONGRATULATIONS! How very exciting! I can imagine you are over the moon and the planning has just begun! Pinterest is a great source of inspiration but like you said it can be super cheesy – I think it really depends a lot on your location! Location dictates so much of what you can and cannot do!

    x
    Shloka
    http://www.thesilksneaker.com

  • Congratulations, Emily! And enjoy the preparations! I really enjoyed the preparations for our wedding six wonderful years ago. Since we were two girls getting married it was quite difficult to get away from the super girly « I’ve been dreaming with my wedding my whole life vibe » that was everywhere. We hadn’t dreamt about our wedding (in part because in Spain it was illegal until 2010!) and we are very casual and our style is relaxed. So we did what we wanted without following what was on trend (I feel like nowadays a wedding is like a staged theater piece or opera! What a production!) So we kept things laid back. But don’t understimate the ideas that you can find on those girly traditional wedding magazines or sites. They can give you lots of tips that you can adapt afterwards. That’s what we did. I have two pieces of advise: enjoy the preparations because the wedding day goes by so quickly that it’s better to enjoy the whole process and not seeing the preparations as « work » and only the wedding day as the fun part, and choose a coulour palette first.
    I wish you both the best!!!
    xx,
    E.
    ww,theslowpace.com

  • Dear Emily,

    Congratulations on your engagement!
    Here’s my story: I found my husband (now of three years) nine month before we got married (although I’ve known him for 14 years then). We got engaged 3 month after we got together and then God had other plans in September, because we were expecting our first daughter, Also, I went through some life-changing events, before we met, so I had short hair at that time. Anyways, I always wanted to walkl down the aisle in my dream wedding gown with really long hair, beautiful flowers and so on. But…instead we organized a quick wedding of 80 guests at the end of November. Nothing really turned out as I ever planned: my gown got ripped during our dance, my hair was short, food was cold, seating turned out to be awful, my make-up was very 1980’s, and I had a terrible flu… However, there was deep peace in our hearts and an ultimate understanding of belonging together when we said yes to the life with each other in front of our family and friends at the church, And it was enough for me to feel and say honestly that it was perfect. The perfect beginning of walking the road together for who knows how long, which is, for me, is more important. So I wish you the same feeling, strength for whatever comes, and health to be able to endure.

  • Love the ring, congratulations ! Do you know the Parisian wedding dress designer Elise Hameau ? I absolutely love what she does. My best friend got married in one of her tailored dresses and she was gorgeous.

  • Congratulations Emily!!! Very exciting. My tip is not to overplan it. Trying to make everything perfect actually just creates anxiety in everyone and can be felt by guests. And get friends involved. People love to help out, especially when you give them an overall brief and then step back and trust them to do whatever it is they are charged with. It somehow all works and comes together in the most heart felt way. Obviously there are things that need to be planned…But allow for spontaneity.

  • Congrats! Having just went through this exact same predicament last year, I feel ya. We are a very unconventional couple, and pretty much broke with convention in every way possible. No diamond for me (white sapphire), he took me to buy my dress, even helped me try it on (don’t worry, he still cried during first look photos, seeing me in full-on makeup, jewelry etc) we walked each their down the aisle, got married in the evening, on a rooftop, with only 30 of our closest friends and family. It was perfect. Lots of online resources for indie brides and weddings. A Practical Wedding is a great site! Stay away from Pinterest. Just a time suck, lots of the same stuff, over and over and over. Have fun and enjoy the process!

  • Congrats Emily! I felt the way you did, I always knew I was meant to be with my husband I loved him when I met him, I could have sprinted down the aisle! :). So really the party is just a celebration of you both. Have fun and don’t stress about the details.

    I was super young and being the oldest in my family, my parents (and his!) ran away with the wedding and it was a HUGE (430+) party. But all I cared about was that there was a lot of good food and people could dance until the wee hours. And I got that in spades. And who cares about the rest?!

    Literally, 19 years later a friend of mine lamented he is still mad he missed our wedding. People only care about the food and the music. That’s what they will remember, not the venue, the place cards, the flowers, your dress, or even the type of day it was. Make sure the food is good and simple, fancy place settings only look pretty and often don’t measure up in taste. And if your guests can’t wait to get up, then the night will progress into awesome memories.

    The party is fun, but the best is yet to come!

  • Congratulations, Emily! I’m so excited for you. I got married a couple years ago and it was a very small wedding in my hometown in western Massachusetts. I also struggled to find wedding dresses that weren’t cookie-cutter or too frilly and found Houghton in NYC. They were so incredible! I chose a dress from their showroom and had it fitted with a few adjustments on the sample. They could not have been nicer, friendlier, and more helpful. We got married in my local Catholic church and had a simple buffet lunch with hamburgers and lobster rolls at my parents house afterwards. Instead of a wedding cake (so not my style) we had ice cream sandwiches. I think smaller is better (we had 60 people) and to compensate we had a huge blowout engagement party where we invited EVERYONE. And now you also have to think about your bridal shower! And registering! I had so much fun with everything and my mother helped out sooo much too and that was incredible. Have fun! If something is stressing you out, ask yourself why you’re doing it. There are so few rules now, do what feels right (and is respectful to family). xoxoxo

  • Auriel Washburn 6 janvier 2017, 12:51 / Répondre

    Congratulations Emily! Like you, I got engaged this past year and we are not especially traditional, over-the-top people. It looks like you’ve gotten a lot of good advice here already, but you and your fiance may also enjoy checking out this book with lots of examples of personal, modern aesthetics:

    https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Wedding-Sandu-Publishing/dp/1584236086/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1483724631&sr=8-6&keywords=the+modern+wedding

    Happy planning!!

  • Congratulations Emily! Like you, I got engaged this past year and we are not especially traditional or over the top people. It looks like you’ve gotten a lot of good advice here already but you and your fiance may also enjoy checking out this book with lots of examples of personal wedding design/aesthetics:

    https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Wedding-Sandu-Publishing/dp/1584236086/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1483725196&sr=8-6&keywords=the+modern+wedding

    Happy planning!!

  • Congratulations! I’m so excited for you. I got married a couple years ago and we had a small, somewhat traditional wedding in my hometown in western Massachusetts. We got married in my local Catholic church and then had a buffet lunch with hamburgers and lobster rolls at my parents house. It was small, with just 60 people. We had a blowout engagement party to compensate where we invited absolutely everyone. I got my wedding from Houghton in NYC because I too wasn’t into the traditional wedding dress. They could not have been friendlier, more helpful or nicer. I picked a gown from their showroom and got it made to measure with a few adjustments on the sample. I was so happy and felt like myself. I got a long, simple veil from J. Crew. We had the most beautiful flowers from Crocus Hale and that was about it. No dancefloor, no dj, no late night party. Instead of cake we had ice cream sandwiches. We did it in a way that made us both comfortable and relaxed. My mother was a huge help and we spent the most time just planning our vows with our priest. Everything else was easy – catering, flowers, dress…Today brides and grooms can write their own rules. If something is stressing you out ask yourself why you’re doing it. xoxo

  • Congratulations! Here’s my piece of wedding advice: Don’t skimp on your outfit. Buy what you love. I tried to be practical so I bought a dress that I « liked » but did not « love. » What I loved cost what seemed like a fortune at the time. In retrospect, I could have afforded it but at the time it felt like an extravagance. I believed I wasn’t worth it nor was I the type of woman to spend that much on a dress. Now every time I look at my wedding photos, I see myself in an « okay » dress that’s slightly too big, bought at a bridal sample sale. Don’t make my mistake! Cheers!

    PS – I give the same advice to my daughter…

  • Oh my gosh oh my gosh CONGRATS BEAUT!! So exciting! I have no wedding thoughts at all for the time being for myself, but I have started a Pinterest to help me decide what my tastes are when the time comes – highly recommend! x

    http://www.stylepetal.co.uk

  • Congratulations! As someone who feels much the same way as you do, and is about to get married herself (30ish days or so to go), I’ll tell you what we did.
    1. The ceremony is on Friday afternoon (we’re using a historic courtroom with special permission from a judge) but the reception is on Saturday night, to decouple the two events. We told our guests we totally understood if they could only make it to Saturday.
    2. We identified the things that were important to us: food, open bar, a dinner party like atmosphere at the reception, not spending a zillion dollars, and designed the events accordingly. So bridesmaids/groomsmen. No DJ or dance floor at the reception, but a cocktail hour with a piano player and a table set up for dinner that encourages movement and flow (some big tables, some small tables, some standing cocktail tables). No photographer because our friends have cameras and we hate cheesy posed photos. No speeches. Super simple decor. Just people hanging out.
    3. Setting our families’ expectations. Since they didn’t want us to elope, we told them they had to compromise on what they *thought* our wedding should look like. It’s not always gone smoothly, but stick to your guns about what you want.

    Our wedding is below budget and shaping up to be mostly what we want.

  • Congratulations Emily! Like you, I got engaged this past year and we are not especially traditional or over the top people. It looks like you’ve gotten a lot of good advice here already but you and your fiance may also enjoy checking out this book with lots of examples of personal wedding design/aesthetics:

    https://www.amazon.com/Modern-Wedding-Sandu-Publishing/dp/1584236086/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1483725196&sr=8-6&keywords=the+modern+wedding

    Happy planning!! Please continue to share your excitement and ideas with us!

  • Hey Emily! Congrats. We just got married in August at our home in the Catskills & I had that exact same issue. We had to bring EVERYTHING in. I’ll save you some time & effort because our vendors were seriously perfect…
    We mixed & matched rentals from Patina Rentals & Borrowed Blu.
    Ariel Dearie is a flower goddess!
    Natalie Trento is an incredible help (& super sweet) if you’d like a planner or coordinator.
    Lev Kuperman to snap some shots.
    Kenan Juska (also Chances with Wolves) – a musical genius.
    Jesse Blades – makeup. period. Super natural & you get to look like yourself on your wedding day!
    We had a really cute couple make a Super 8 film for us up in the Catskills

    Ahhh. It was all so beautiful. Wish you the most beautiful day and lifetime together. Love is the best. I get so excited calling my husband « my husband. »

  • Hey Emily! Congrats. We just got married in August at our home in the Catskills & I had that exact same issue. We had to bring EVERYTHING in. I’ll save you some time & effort because our vendors were seriously perfect…
    We mixed & matched rentals from Patina Rentals & Borrowed Blu.
    Ariel Dearie is a flower goddess!
    Natalie Trento is an incredible help (& super sweet) if you’d like a planner or coordinator.
    Lev Kuperman to snap some shots.
    Kenan Juska (also Chances with Wolves) – a musical genius.
    Jesse Blades – makeup. period. Super natural & you get to look like yourself on your wedding day!
    We had a really cute couple make a Super 8 film for us up in the Catskills

    Ahhh. It was all so beautiful. Wish you the most beautiful day and lifetime together. Love is the best. I get so excited calling my husband « my husband. » Just enjoy every minute & don’t be engaged too long – you’ll drive yourself nuts with all the planning.

  • Lovely news, congratulation! As a reference point, you might want to consider WW11 Spring Brides, for inspiration. A period in history where hope, and rationing should reminds all what it is to be real, to feel alive…. X

  • Congratulations Emily! Very happy for you.

  • Congratulations Emily! Very happy for you!

  • Dear Emily! Congratulation to your engagement. Since you are asking for advice and since I had my wedding last May I’ll share my wisdom (haha). As you said, lots of wedding stuff is girly and gender unequaled we decided with my than boyfriend to make everything by ourselves and with help of our friends. I made my own dress, our friends played during ceremony some Arcade Fire and Cure, our moms baked pastry other guests brought pies. « Official » catering was also provided by my friend, nothing fancy – just some goulash, curry and salads. The decoration was from tons of Christmas lights and on the tables we had flowers from my inlaws garden that were placed in old chemistry glass (we are teachers so the school was also our provider). Late in night we had a concert and karaoke. All in all it was proper DIY wedding. Everybody said it was amazing, very free, wild and spontaneous just like me and my man and that’s the main point I think. Good luck with your wedding!

  • If you don’t want an ultra predictable, cliche wedding dress, I would suggest buying from somewhere such as Free People or the like. I disliked all the classic wedding dresses, so I went with a bohemian cotton lace dress. I loved it because I felt very original and nontraditional!

  • hi emily! congrats! I totally get not wanting to be a ‘frou frou’ bride. I absolutely love oncewed.com for some minimalist inspo, as well as ginnyau.com, who is an amazing stylist and her portfolio. good luck with the planning!

  • Yes, please share!! I am supposed to help a friend pick her wedding dress and I know NOTHING about weddings!! The bride sent a message that went like, « So I have this problem, and you’re going to laugh. I need to find a wedding dress and my mom and best friend are 3,000-6,000 miles away, so… hey friend!! » (ex-pat life haha) (p.s. congratulations!)

  • Super massive congratulations, Emily!!! So incredibly thrilled and excited for you. Two people loving one another so authentically is so special to see. Not gonna lie, I really love hearing you on Pocket Pardon My French and can tell how much you obviously adore your sweetheart! Yay!

    I got married just under six months ago to my darling guy and it was beyond magical and without question, the most epically wonderful few days of our lives. We were really OCD about our wedding and making it as creatively true to us as possible — so rustic glam with a sense of humour was what we went for. We both work in areas of events (media and branding for me and DJ/production for him) so we essentially treated it like the most killer event of our lives while branding it with our specific vision to make sure it was a super special, transportative experience for our loved ones. Having a multi-day event was really crucial to make this happen.

    hellomay.com.au is an Australian publication that has awesome and unique weddings that are glam and stylish that you must check out! Green Wedding Shoes is also quite good.
    Also please feel free, and obviously no pressure with this, to reach out to me as I’d very happily forward you our hardcore Google planning docs! My email is aoifejulianield@gmail.com
    We were told a number of times by our vendors that we were the most organised couple they’d ever worked with, hahaha ? You can also feel free to creep our wedding hashtag: #lanelovefest

    One last thing is to go with what feels right for you — your personal style (including dress!) — and to have vendors you can have open, candid conversations with. Our celebrant, photographer and DJ are all very close friends of ours and it made the whole planning experience and day of, that much more spectacular and relaxed. We knew they really wanted the best for us and everyone there.

    Hooray again for you both!!!! xx

  • Super massive congratulations, Emily!!! So incredibly thrilled and excited for you. Two people loving one another so authentically is so special to see. Not gonna lie, I really love hearing you on Pocket Pardon My French and can tell how much you obviously adore your sweetheart! Yay!

    I got married just under six months ago to my darling guy and it was beyond magical and without question, the most epically wonderful few days of our lives. We were really OCD about our wedding and making it as creatively true to us as possible — so rustic glam with a sense of humour was what we went for. We both work in areas of events (media and branding for me and DJ/production for him) so we essentially treated it like the most killer event of our lives while branding it with our specific vision to make sure it was a super special, transportative experience for our loved ones. Having a multi-day event was really crucial to make this happen.

    hellomay.com.au is an Australian publication that has awesome and unique weddings that are glam and stylish that you must check out! Green Wedding Shoes is also quite good.
    Also please feel free, and obviously no pressure with this, to reach out to me as I’d very happily forward you our hardcore Google planning docs! My email is aoifejulianield@gmail.com
    We were told a number of times by our vendors that we were the most organised couple they’d ever worked with, hahaha ? You can also feel free to creep our wedding hashtag: #lanelovefest

    One last thing is to go with what feels right for you — your personal style (including dress!) — and to have vendors you can have open, candid conversations with. Our celebrant, photographer and DJ are all very close friends of ours and it made the whole planning experience and day of, that much more spectacular and relaxed. We knew they really wanted the best for us and everyone there.

    Hooray again for you both!!!! xx

  • Super massive congratulations, Emily!!! So incredibly thrilled and excited for you. Two people loving one another so authentically is so special to see. Not gonna lie, I really love hearing you on Pocket Pardon My French and can tell how much you obviously adore your sweetheart! Yay!

    I got married just under six months ago to my darling guy and it was beyond magical and without question, the most epically wonderful few days of our lives. We were really OCD about our wedding and making it as creatively true to us as possible — so rustic glam with a sense of humour was what we went for. We both work in areas of events (media and branding for me and DJ/production for him) so we essentially treated it like the most killer event of our lives while branding it with our specific vision to make sure it was a super special, transportative experience for our loved ones. Having a multi-day event was really crucial to make this happen.

    hellomay.com.au is an Australian publication that has awesome and unique weddings that are glam and stylish that you must check out! Green Wedding Shoes is also quite good.
    Also please feel free, and obviously no pressure with this, to reach out to me as I’d very happily forward you our hardcore Google planning docs! My email is aoifejulianield@gmail.com
    We were told a number of times by our vendors that we were the most organised couple they’d ever worked with, hahaha ? You can also feel free to creep our wedding hashtag: #lanelovefest

    One last thing is to go with what feels right for you — your personal style (including dress!) — and to have vendors you can have open, candid conversations with. Our celebrant, photographer and DJ are all very close friends of ours and it made the whole planning experience and day of, that much more spectacular and relaxed. We knew they really wanted the best for us and everyone there.

    Hooray again for you both!!!! xx

  • Hello Emily,
    Congratulations ! I don’t coment a lot on blogs (probably because i’m french and my english is a disaster) but a couldn’t NOT give you some french blogs and wedding planners’ web sites which are far away from the « froufrou » style :
    1) Un beau jour :
    http://www.unbeaujour.fr
    2) The french festival « Andy » dedicated to wedding has a website :
    http://www.andyfestival.com
    3) La mariée au pieds nus :
    https://www.lamarieeauxpiedsnus.com
    4) Noobah :
    http://www.noobah.com/index.php
    5) Le plus beau jour du reste de ma vie (= « the most beautiful day of the rest of my life »…well, something close!)
    http://www.leplusbeaujourdurestedemavie.com
    6) La mariée en colère (for brides and future moms)
    http://lamarieeencolere.com

    I hope that could help you find some inspiration !
    Congratulations again.

  • Congratulations! The ring is beautiful! I wish you both all the best :) xx

    http://knightcaroline1.wixsite.com/hebesophia

  • Chloe Malle
    If you haven’t already google her wedding (vogue) perfection!
    Sue

  • It can be tough trying to find an alternative to the usual wedding stuff. That’s why when Matt and I got married – we picked our favourite outfits from our favourite stores – regardless of tradition – just something we adored wearing !
    See … He wore dusky pink Acne and I wore all black Celine…

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BGiG_exs_ov/

  • Jane with the noisy terrier 9 janvier 2017, 9:55 / Répondre

    Emily! I just saw this post and am absolutely thrilled for you and Josh (lucky man!). Enjoy the process, listen to your own voice and try not to be swayed by others’ opinions (though do remember that this is a big day for your family as well and look for ways that they can be part of the celebration as well!). Most of all, have fun and remember that the marriage is what is most important, not the wedding. You’re going to be a radiant, joyful bride! Best wishes to you two.

  • Congratulations!! I would elope and spend as much time as possible on a grand honeymoon : )

  • Congratulations Emily! I would recommend « Un Beau Jour », it’s a french website but I’m sure you’ll get the general vibe, which is rather low key (I’m guessing compared to US weddings, but that’s just an assumption). Maybe already out there, sorry I didn’t take the time to read all the comments above :)
    Hope you find the inspiration you’re looking for!

  • Congrats. I did a double take on IG when I saw the ring. It’s a beauty.

    I’m neither engaged or married, but this great shop called Lover’s Land popped up in my neighbourhood in Toronto a few years ago. It was born by the exact things you mentioned in your post.

    Have fun planning. Can’t wait to hear more about it

    http://www.loversland.com/

    xM.

  • Oh I just love Emerald cut rings, I have one myself:) congrats!!

  • CONGRATULATIONS!! Now I’ve to tell you, I congratulated because that’s what everybody does!! I may have said « Get well Soon » or « Be safe » or something else!! Back to the question-« Why the F*** are you getting married? ». or « Why do you need to get married? »

  • If you come by Philly for your dress I would take the extra drive down to Wilmington DE for your dress! No taxes! I got married in back home in France in September but bought it here in the States since we live here (I talk about it on my blog if you want to check it out) so good luck with planning, hope it is local !

  • Hi Emily !

    First of all, congratulations ! And please do share as much as you both want to :)

    My recommendation, since I think I remember you saying that you or Josh are (part?) Jewish, is to check out « The New Jewish Wedding » by Anita Diamant. Even if you aren’t religious, it is an easy read that is very practical, laying out options for egalitarian couples who may have Jew-ish backgrounds. There are some cool traditions and stories and quotes about love that aren’t super « Jew centric. » If this isn’t your religion, cool! Sometimes religion is off the mark and sometimes it hits it.

    All the best,
    Samantha

  • Hi Samantha,
    Thank you so much for this tip! We’ve been struggling with the decision of if we want to have a Jewish wedding or not, so I have a feeling this will come in very handy.
    Thanks again!
    x Emily

  • Congratulations! I didn’t realize until today’s post that you were engaged. I highly recommend Docuvitae, a photo studio run by Laura Kleinhelz, a former photojournalist. http://www.docuvitae.com/ She and her staff have impeccable taste and an eye for catching raw, intimate moments. Absolutely the opposite of cheesy. We could not have been happier with their work.

  • Hi Emily!

    First I want to congratulate you for this wonderful new path you and your love one are about to begin.

    My mother is a big follower of your blog and she showed me this. So I wanted to reach you to recommend you a great wedding video service I think you might like. And right on cue this is where I come in… Ta-Dah!! Let me Introduce myself. My name is Diego, and I’m a wedding videographer. I’ve been shooting weddings for some time now in my country, Venezuela but I recently moved to NYC. I find great passion in my work because I get to do what I love for people that is living a very exciting and important moment in their lives. And I think all that reflects in the final product that is only intended to be an aesthetic visual memoir of a celebration of love.
    You and your soon to be husband strike me like a fresh and joyful couple and very much in love, so It would be my pleasure to capture all that trough my lens.

    I’ll leave you the link to my wedding reel so you can see some of my work.
    https://vimeo.com/202255526
    And if you want to see some of the full videos you can scroll down in this link http://www.diegomartintereso.com/mediolimon/

    I hope this inspires you and you choose me to take part in this day. And we can sit and talk ideas and I promise you I’ll do my best to give you the best memory for your future.

    It’s been a pleasure.
    Con mucho cariño.
    Diego!

  • I would love to shoot your wedding:) And CONGRATULATIONS!

    http://www.kateedwardsweddings.com/

  • Congrats!!!! Got engaged too 3 weeks ago and since none of us are from the country where we live (Germany), trying to find just the country gives me a headache. Any advice on organising a destination wedding? Keep us posted in any case, I am very interested in that subject now :)(and don’t want froufrou either!)

  • Congrats! Try a new Spanish website called Casilda se casa for some inspo http://casildasecasa.vogue.es enjoy the ride :)

  • You must check Elise Hameau for your dress!

  • If you come by Philly for your dress I would take the extra drive down to Wilmington DE for your dress! No taxes! I got married in back home in France in September but bought it here in the States since we live here (I talk about it on my blog if you want to check it out) so good luck with planning, hope it is local !

  • Hello ! je lis ton post et j’ai un IMMENSE sourire qui se dessine sur mon visage.. je me rappelle mes préparatifs de mariage et notre envie absolument inconditionnelle d’un mariage chic (ok ok… ) mais aussi (et peut-être même SURTOUT) FUN !
    Le résultat… Un tournoi de babyfoot entre témoins, une planche de surf comme livre d’or (devenu notre table de salon depuis ;-) et des pti clins d’oeil à notre mode de vie start-up ! Le plus important : il faut que votre mariage vous ressemble. fait un tour sur unconfetti.com
    Ca va te donner des idées…

  • Maureen Poschman 1 juin 2017, 8:52 / Répondre

    Read Jo Piazza’s HOW TO BE MARRIED….

  • Hi!
    I’m not a bride and have no intentions to be a groom soon.
    But I’m a wedding photographer.
    All that I can say is that you should marry in daylight, at least the ceremony.
    I LOVE when the ceremony is at daylight, in a farm, or even better, in a yard.
    So cosy, so romantic, and the pictures.. so much better.
    I’m excited to see your wedding choices but, no pressure!
    In the end, even you not being a froufrou bride, Garance gang have a very good taste and I’m sure it will be a very beautifull wedding party.
    Love from Brazil!
    Congrats!

  • Hi! Molly Guy and her Stonefoxbride team must be the right thing for you!
    All the best, Romina

  • Hi, my name is Julie Marguaritha Bonde, I work as a freelance wedding photographer and you can take a look at my website and hopefully you would like my style!:) congratulations!
    / Julie Marguaritha
    @juliemarguaritha

  • Then all you need is thelane.com!

  • Martha Stewart Weddings on line is all you need to start formulating a very personalized wedding

  • Congratulations!! We too are planning our wedding. I second having a look at Hello May’s website and I am loving White Magazine. Their blog posts incredibly beautiful, classic and sophisticated weddings that dont feature burlap. I’m trying to shy away from Pinterest as it is all the same ruguritated stuff! Good luck!

  • Congratulations!!!
    I have a website to recommand for full inspiration http://www.bippitymag.com and check out there instagram it’s really cool too. I worked with the girls at http://www.rubancollectif.fr and I loved having them with us for our special day!

  • Alessandra Mariotti 4 juin 2017, 4:00 / Répondre

    How about a destination wedding in Montepulciano Tuscany with a smaller group of your nearest and dearest? So instead of just one day of celebrations you can have a whole week of fun!
    We hosted 4 incredible weddings this May at our villa in Tuscany and our guests could have not been happier. From a casual pizza rehearsal dinner (fired in our very own pizza oven) and an intimate group winetasting tour to a wedding ceremony celebrated in front of a magnificent valley of rolling fields of olive trees and sunflowers (said to be the same valley used as the background of the Mona Lisa). I can highly recommend our villa as a wonderful and unique choice for your wedding. http://www.villalanticaposta-ilvillino.com

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